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Lyrics / Prey
(Hook)
Always the same, your charming ways, words you say.
No, it never changes,
You alwayyyysss get your prey.
(chorus)
- whomever you set your sights on tonight
- you know is yours, they never put up a fight
- so entranced, are they, so quickly, fall prey
- hells spell for you and your demonic way
Watching you is like learning from a master.
Poor little girls intent on playing with disaster.
They know not, what demon stands before them.
Eyes barely focused on this, star studded gem.
(chorus)
You, hustle and you flow.
You, do it best, you know.
These girls don't have a chance.
Willing to do you in an instance.
(chorus)
(solo guitar riff)
Sadly, age will not instill wisdom for bad boy chasers.
Just a never ending pursuit of loveless wasters.
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cakeinautumn reviewed Version 1 -
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I really like the message of these lyrics, and the feelings of the narrator/singer/song writer. Though personally I’d like it to be a bit more, oh, personal?
Some of the punctuation throws me off, however that can be dismissed to keep with the musical rhythm you might have had in mind when writing this.
Nothing else bothers me. I can see this on the charts one day, given the right music to accompany it.
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alecthegreat reviewed Version 1 -
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You mainly maintain a solid rhythm through the lyrics, though in the “you, hustle and you flow” stanza, the lines feel short compared to the rest of the lyrics. Also, the last line feels forced in order to rhyme with chance. Try either rewriting that stanza or adding a couple of words to the lines. Maybe something like this:
Watching while you hustle and you flow
Without compare you do it best you know
These other girls don’t even have a chance
You’ve spun me, trapped within your trance
cooljim102055 reviewed Version 1 -
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hi there,
very good..i like the orginal way you use hte word prey..like animals hunting..for their victims to love…and the unaware young girls not seeing it coming..though you mention the title once in your lyric..you should try to work it in a few more times..other than that ..i think it’s a good one..nice job,,jim
ante reviewed Version 1 -
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I’ve recently written a few songs myself, and so have looked at other classic songs to see if there is a formula or what makes a great song. I think a great song is the combination of lyrics and the instrumentation(obviously), but the thing is there are so many classic songs that, if dissected lyrically, mean absolutely nothing and have no meaning whatsoever.
That said, it makes it hard to critique a song solely by reading the lyrics. Though your lyrics seem decent enough its hard to say what i think of them without hearing the whole song, its the instrumentation thart brings the soul to the music, allows you to put the emotion into each word. As i’ve said before, some of the blandest, cliched lyrics can still be a classic song, if the emotion and melody are right. Would like to hear what the song sounds like.
Patience_is_a_virtue reviewed Version 1 -
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you approached a very cliche’ topic (girls and the bad boys) in a very unique and satisfying way. i enjoyed it. though it does leave the listener/reader wanting a bit more. it’s a little short… but that’s difficult to accurately judge on here when i can’t hear the music that it’s set with. otherwise, good job overall.
cyndiratz reviewed Version 1 -
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Good set of lyrics. Sure wish I could hear the music along with them. Rarely do we hear songs about girls falling prey to the bad boys although reality dictates that. Your last set of lines ring true as many women who chase those bad boys never learn. It is like a rusted badge of honor of sorts.
gaiascully reviewed Version 1 -
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I though that this was a good idea for a song. The line “so entranced, are they, so quickly, fall prey” is a little confusing. I pretty much understand what you are trying to say but it seems rearranged and it doesn’t state your point clearly, to me anyway. I think that if you polished this that it could be very catchy. :)
fred_kane reviewed Version 1 -
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I like the theme. It’s one I return to in my writings (from the opposite perspective, but with the same message.)
Wendy reviewed Version 1 -
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I really enjoyed reading your lyrics for “Prey”. It was well written, it gets the message across and the story your telling. Well done! One note of advice in the area: NOTES FOR REVIEWER The creator of this item has not left any specific reviewer instructions. You might want to leave a message of what type of genre your lyrics fall under. Rock, pop, metal, melody this will help the reviewer determine the lyrics flow easier.
I look forward to reading more of your works.
CynicGod reviewed Version 1 -
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Great song!
I would be more impressed if the ending was a little longer though; it leaves the reader kinda in limbo.
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