Stage Play / Promise (Analysis)
Setting: A dark prison. A single cell. In it is an old prison bunk. The mattresses are filthy and stained. Occupying these cots are two men, Aaron on the bottom, Brady on the top. The cell is eerily silent except for the occasional sound of a rat scurrying across the cold floor looking for remnants of the prisoners’ meals. After a few moments of this silence, Aaron’s voice is heard.
Aaron: Hey. Brady. You up?
Brady turns in bed, the few remaining springs in his mattress squeal in disapproval. He doesn’t respond.
Aaron: [trying again. this time slightly louder] Brady? Can you hear me?
Brady: Yeah I hear ya. Whattaya want?
Aaron pauses until Brady speaks again.
Brady: [this time a little softer] Well you gonna tell me kid?
Aaron: I was just thinking.
Brady: Yeah?
Aaron: Tomorrow's the day.
Brady: Yup. Sure is.
Aaron pauses shortly before he continues speaking.
Aaron: I’ll be getting the chair.
Brady: [indifferently] I know.
Another pause.
Aaron: Ever wonder...what it’ll feel like? To be dead?
Brady: [responding after a while] Nope.
Aaron: Do you believe in life after death?
Brady: I don’t reckon so.
Aaron: I do. But not like heaven and hell. I think when people die, for doing something bad, I think God lets them come back, to be good. You think that happens Brady?
Brady: [repeating himself] I don’t reckon so.
Aaron: Well, maybe when I die...I’ll come back as a good guy, like a policeman, and I’ll keep people safe and I’ll not want to hurt them. You think I could do that?
Brady: I don’t suppose you could do that after you died. You’d be dead. ‘Sides cops ain’t that good. Hell, they got you in here didn’t they?
Aaron: But that’s their job. I did something...bad, and they had to do their job. [he pauses a while then speaks again]
Aaron: Brady, ya ever feel like you can’t help but be bad and do bad things? Like God made it your job to be bad? Maybe he done that so we’s could teach others not to be bad. Maybe when people see us die they don’t wanna do bad things anymore. So it’s like we helping people...in a way.
Brady: [in frustration] How’d you come up with that load of bull? Ain’t no God out there telling you to be bad. You’re bad because you just are. Guards say you got something wrong with you, some kinda mental imbalance or whatever they call it. Ain’t no God telling you to be bad.
Aaron: [in disappointment] Maybe.
A long pause follows. Aaron looks up and stares at the bottom of Brady’s bunk. Suddenly he begins to cry softly. He starts to mumble something under his breath incoherently. Annoyed by the sound, Brady yells down at him in frustration.
Brady: What the hell are you going on about?
Aaron: [remorsefully and while stifling sobs] I didn’t wanna kill her Brady! It was an accident I swear! I never done hurt someone in my life before, I dunno why I did! [in panicked confusion] W-why did I do it Brady. Why Brady?
Brady: Aaron would you shut the hell up already? What you asking me for? Do I look like I care? You can’t do nothing to fix what you done Aaron, neither can I. It’s who we are. Now get to sleep!
Another pause.
Aaron: Brady do you remember Paul? How he killed his cellmate by strangling him in the night ‘cuz he wanted the top bunk?
Brady: [barely audible] Yeah.
Aaron: One day I asked him why he done that, killing someone for a bed, and he just laughed at me and said, “Makes no difference to me, I get my own cell now.”
Brady doesn’t respond.
Aaron: Brady?
Brady: [angrily] What!
Aaron: Can you promise me something?
Brady: I’ll promise you anything if you’ll shut up and go to bed.
Aaron: Okay. I’ll stop talking but you have to promise.
Brady: [in exasperation] Okay. What do you want me to promise?
Aaron pauses before continuing.
Aaron: Promise me Brady. Promise me you won’t do bad things anymore.
Brady: [indifferently] Yeah. Okay. I promise. Happy?
Aaron: Be serious. Promise.
Brady: All right. I promise I won’t do bad things anymore. That good?
Aaron: Yeah. That’s good.
Brady: Okay. Stop talking now.
Aaron: K, Brady.
The lights dim and return. The next day Brady wakes up. He crankily gets out of his bunk and makes his way to the toilet in the corner of the cell. After relieving himself, he turns around to see Aaron still asleep.
Brady: Wake up, gotta face the day.
no response.
Brady: Come on kid, get the hell up.
Brady makes his way over to Aaron.
Brady: [shaking him] Get up. Do ya hear me? I said get up. Brady begins to shake him even harder. Aaron still does not wake up. He then notices that the sheets are red.
Brady: [confused] What the hell...? [he begins to yell]
Brady: [very loudly] Aaron wake up! [shaking him even harder] Wake up! Aaron I’m gonna kill--
Brady breaks down. He continues yelling as tears form in his eyes. Hearing all this commotion, three guards make their way over to the cell.
Guard One: Hey, what the hell’s going on in here?
Brady doesn’t respond but continues shaking Aaron.
Guard Two: Christ, that one’s dead.
Guard One: You’re kidding? Right before his execution? Hahaha, wow. Guess we gotta clean it up.
Guard Three: Yeah.
The three guards enter the cell. Guard Three restrains Brady while the other two examine Aaron’s body.
Guard One: Whooee. Talk about a lot of blood. What did he slit? Wrist? Neck?
Guard Two: Looks like the wrist. [he pries something from Aaron’s hand] Well I’ll be. Looks like he used this rusty screw from his bed to do it, too. Talk about determination!
Guard One: Hahaha, yeah. Let’s get ‘im outta here.
Guards one and two carry Aaron’s body out of the room. Guard Three remains for a while, eyeing Brady. After a while he makes for the cell door but before leaving looks back to Brady and speaks.
Guard Three: What’s up with you? He was gonna die today anyway.
Brady doesn’t respond. For a short while Guard Three remains in the cell doorway before walking off. Brady makes his way over to the bottom bunk and pulls himself up onto it. He has stopped crying. He brings his knees to his chin and wraps his arms around his ankles.
Brady: [whispering] I promise.
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I thought this to be a well written play and could see Aaron on the bottom bunk looking up at the bunk above him, thinking and regretting. I just don’t understand why he had to die by suicide. If he made Brady promise to be good and was wondering about God, he wouldn’t have committed the ultimate sin of suicide. Especially after being so remorseful of his own crime. Wouldn’t Brady feel the same after Aaron was put to death? You know like think about the promise as Aaron is led out of the cell? Well, it was a good read. Nice job!
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A few flaws—- Ex: The cell… condemed are alone, not in shared cells. It may have worked better with each inmate in seperate cells next to each other. I am still confused as to why the inmate committed suicide. What brought him to it knowing he was to die soon anyway. All-in-all, a pretty nicely written piece.
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