Poetry / Sworn Enemy...

Silence
Vast silence
Smashing my face with violence
Spread as far as the darkness that has befallen my heart
That was torn and shred with the words of your heart

You spoke to me
You pleaded with me
And begged me to understand
Understand how you couldn’t be 100 percent of a man
The man I need and want you to be
Something I thought I did see
But you said you couldn’t see nor think clearly

But I said I didn’t care because you were never a 100 percent
I always thought of you as a perfectly functioning car with a tiny dent

But you refused to keep me and have me and casted me a side
No longer wanted me to ride
I felt my insides turn cold
And my outside burn up and for the first time I did what I was told
I felt my emotions concave and fold…right on top of the other
My cries choked and gagged me till I was completely smothered

So I back away and for the first time I threw neither insult nor comment
For the first time I knew your words…you meant
Hard and firm like cement
This decision couldn’t be changed or bent

I took a big bite of home made humble pie
And swallowed a big piece
A piece so huge I hoped it would kill me

And I never felt so betrayed and unloved although in my mind I knew I was loved
And hugged
Kissed
And caressed
And you always put forward your best
Just …for…me

But I felt like that little girl again who had no daddy
Cause he walked from me since he couldn’t be a “100 percent” daddy
So why should every good man that comes to me
Say they gotta go cause they can’t be the best for me
I didn’t care whether you were 100 percent
Just like I love my daddy till this day although he never gave me a dollar nor a cent…

So you said your goodbyes
As I continued to eat that damn humble pie
And cry
Silent tears down my face
A creeping fear that took loves place


So ashamed…I first spoke to no one
I put blame to my name and cried out for someone
And then a wise person came …I cried myself out to
And spoke to
And said to
“I was good woman and you were a scared boyfriend”

I was scold and told
Quite bluntly
And up frontally
I was not…a good girlfriend
And you were one and a million

This time I took a bite of reality
And was bitch slapped out of my false fantasy

I had to look back in time
And rewind
And remind myself what you have done for me

You first came to me…a light to my darkness
Innocence to my twisted being
Kindness to my starkness
And with your love I watched my lack of trust evanescing

I always scream and yell
Fight and tell
You what u do wrong
And I try and stab you with my tongue
That sung
Ugly words off the sharp tip
That gripped you and ripped at parts with in you
I punch tears out of you
Sucked air from inside you

You were selfish
And I was selfless
You was a cheater
And I was too
But I spoke my truth
You was a killer
And I was saint

But I was disillusioned
Filled with stupidity and confusion
In reality
You were selfless
And I was selfish
I was the cheater
And you spoke honest truth

 


You didn’t have to stay with a girl
Who legs were open
Wasn’t copin’
Mopin’
Jokin’ around when there was nothing funny to be heard

I sliced and diced at my arms
Sent you into full gear and alarm
And all u wanted to do was hold me…protect me and keep me warm

I blamed my prostitution on you
I cried and said I had swallowed my pride cause of you
Turning tricks
Sucking dick
Making picks
Of who I would let stick…it…to me


But it was my choice
And it was your voice…I heard crack when u heard what I had done
And you had to swallow your pride
Your integrity
Your beliefs and what u was taught
And baby…you choose not to run

In the end all my accusation
Frustration
Mutilation
Was all reversed
And…you I never deserved

But I can say my last three words
Cause they are due

 

I love you…
 

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jakuper avatar Random Review

July 02, 2009

jakuper Prolific-icon-medium

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jakuper reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

@But you said you couldn’t see nor think clearly
But I said I didn’t care because you were never a 100 percent@
You should change the second “but” because this way it sounds wrong.

I like you compare him to a dented car in which he doesn’t want you to ride. It’s an interesting parable.

@You didn’t have to stay with a girl
Who legs were open@—-it should be “whose legs”

It’s a very good poem about torn out girl who doesn’t know who to blame, still loving the boy.

DLCW avatar Random Review

July 03, 2009

DLCW

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DLCW reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

Good piece it has strong emotions .“I was good woman and you were a scared boyfriend”                               ^ an a goes there.
thanks for letting me read this it was really good.

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SultryPoet avatar

SultryPoet

Age: 19
Loc: Bronx, NY
Gen: F
Last Login: October 23
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