Haiku/Senryu / Improv Night at the Playhouse
The tape’s rolling and
the Director yells action.
Why don’t you shine the
Lights through my eyes? Cast
shadows and pass me a script,
or a pen. Slight pause,
Enter the tease and
the collector, as she plays
the game so well she’s
Forgotten the camera.
And the set of directions.
The booklet that came
inside the box is buried
somewhere among the
Endless moving trucks,
But she seems wonderfully
sincere right now, and
Normally you feel
like everything’s a show. Well
the sincerity
Is real but it still feels like
a show to me, and we’re
Playing our parts so
well—writers with a tendency
towards the theatrics.
It’s Act Five, and your
improv is lacking. No, you’re
not processing, but
Storing it away—
forgotten file cabinets.
You can’t believe I
Can solve a Rubik’s Cube that’s
been painted black, But she broke
In your basement
window before you opened
the kitchen door.
It slips out without
thought, welding another link
in the chain. It’s your
Move, but she counts cards.
Everyone’s got their favorite
mask—or several.
I’ve got my character, I’ve
got my pawn. Intermission.
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You know what? I loved this. Honestly, I didn’t quite understand all of it, so I’m certainly going back and reading this a few more times. Just the fact that I’m interested enough to even WANT to read this several times and try to get means that you’re doing a good job. You catch the readers interest, I think.
Mostly, I want to know how “she” is connected with you and who it is you’re speaking to. Very interesting!
I do have a question though: Does this poem necessarily even need to be a haiku? It seems like you could have just broken the lines up anywhere you wanted, but make it a haiku just for the sake of having a haiku. I don’t know. IS there any particular reason you chose haiku form? Traditionally, most haiku invoke a feeling of nature or the seasons or something like that, only reason why I’m curious. Either way, good job.
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Brilliant. I have not yet seen this pattern and so am taken by it.
Half way through I stopped counting the syllables and started to take in the meaning.
You lost me a little between the kitchen and the basement but no matter.
Great work and use of words, rhythm, and motif.
Bravo!
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