Quotes / Limbo

I’m talking re-maria nelson comment as if maybe i had a past existence where i was an evil person only i don’t kbnow it in this life.
Sadly if you never read the notes or are so insensitive then you wo’t understand it. its common sense.

THank-you, I never get the semi-colon thing right lol, i right for the meaning rather than technocalities. I guess i accept i’ll never be the perfect writer grammatician LOL.

same here. I let other people handle my grammatical mistakes.

Thanks, August 29th. In some ways I’m lucky, but relationship with human wise I am not.

THanks

THanks for your advice, yes I know you know it, I can tell by your review. If you check out my comments to previous reviewers you’ll get an idea why I wrote this, and yes I love how you said I wrote this to get it out(I used to say as a victim of bullying as a child, or when I felt not listened too,”I need to get it out LOL. If you read my other comments on this, you’ll see why I got this low.Thanks for the review and typo’s.

my pleasure, and I did read through your comments after I reviewed.  Sounds like a lousy situation indeed.  However, being a victim is partially a mindset.  Having had my share of abuse in life, I feel at liberty to express that you can choose to take the wrongs done to you as an assault against your humanity, or as an opportunity to become stronger.

I was physically assulted too. Not sure how a singer can become stronger or more successful when someone has took the time to go around lying saying i’m a theif. thats really going to encourage someone to give me an opportunit(not). I have battled 35 years against bullies. Maybe you don’t know the old Meadowell  rioters. they never quit. If you type in the computer i’m sure you’ll find some history on these characters. You can’t shift them.

I don’t doubt that you have suffered.  I’m not looking to compare scars.  What I mean to tell you is that in my experience one can spend time, as you are now, lamenting about the wrongs done and the wrongs to come, or one can use the experiences of life to get a thicker skin.  Unfortunately, how to make art from pain is not something anyone can teach; it is, in itself, an artform.

People who are thick skinned often appear to me as uncaring (not saying you are here). Often the people with thick skin are the ones found to be laughing at the misfortunes of others. That is not in my nature, the trouble with being thick skinned is that nothing gets through, when you are in pain, you don’t feel it. Pain whether physical or emotional is a warning that something is wrong and when something is wrong it should be corrected, that doesn’t happen thus things get worse. When others are in pain  with a thick skin we cant show care . that is my problem with growing a thick skin. Maybe this discussion is art in its own way.
Yesterday I met a guy in the library whom I only knew by sight, I invited hinm to my house after he struck up a conversation with me. He discussed his personal battle with alcohol, partially admitting he had a problem, but then partially denying it. I wanted to help, others would of walked by. THe guy is a nice enough bloke , like all humans, he has his faults, but why should he not have somewhere to go and talk and be heard and maybe he would learn from me the medical effects and reasons for his delerium tremens, maybe then he’d seek proffessional help to solve his problem, he was obviously thinking about it or he would’nt of spoken to me, that to me was his first step to seeking help. and because he;’s realising his addiction is becoming a problem for him and his families trust and that he is loosing his own self respect and the respect of those around him. He needed a freindly ear, And i was that friendly ear, had i had a thick skin maybe he would’nt of got my help and anyone fighting an addiction needs some outside support. I honestly can understand why this man tries to blot out his pain with more alcohol. He’s on benifits and can’t afford the habit, and he smokes. That is why he get the tremmors, because he can’t feed his habit and he is in his own kind of limbo. I’ve offered to be there if he needs a friend. Hes not a creep or a pervert all he wanted was friendship. His life is currently spent, complaining about the benifits system, playing card games on his old pc(he doesn’t have the net) and needing a drink. Hes not eating properly either, I cooked him bacon and tomatoe pasta and he could#nt eat it. I know another bloke exactly like this, the alcohol becomes their food, and they emd up digesting themselves and becoming thin. I find that hard to watch without trying to help. I told him what was happening to his body and why. but i also told him i kind of understood his craving. He said it himself it numbs his pain. But I explained his pain would become worse.

I used to work on an alcohol detox ward and it to me is strange why this guy is drawn to me, Its not the first time people fighting alcoholism wanted to talk to me, maybe that is my purpose in this life, i’m not sure.

Being resilient isn’t the same as being uncaring, and certainly isn’t being crass.  There are many degrees that you are completely skipping; skin isn’t armor and armor isn’t complete removal and so on.  I’m not advising you to grind down the gears and refuse to be engaged by suffering.  I do advise you to accept that terrible things happen to absolutely everyone, and from those events we define something of ourselves.  
It seems your time spent with the self-pitying has perhaps influenced you.  Feeling empathy can be a very positive tool in self-development, but it can also be an excuse to wallow in the sad lives of those who have an even worse lot than you.  I, like you, wish to help everyone I can, but I don’t see that as my purpose in life.  Sometimes it is more of a flaw than something to be proud of.
I don’t know anything about “purpose in life.”  Frankly, I don’t believe that any of us are meant for anything other than what we choose to do.  If you enjoy providing comfort for the sick and suffering then doing that is a purpose indeed.  The world needs charitable people.

I agree, the guy i’m helping is a nice enough person, he’s not intellectual but hes not selfish either. Sometimes seeing people worse than yourself helps you feel better about you’ life and if you can help them change theres for the better then that makes me feel better, He actually helped me today cause I was running out of milk *(LOL Extrea tea for him see. And don’t get paid till tuesday so he bought me a milk, i’d gave him a couple of polo shirts i don’t wear, and that to me is what lifes about, giving and taking. Helping each other when times are tough, if times aren’t tough then maybe we don’t need to worry about those things. (See maslows hierachy of needs, its so true I know it) i’ve been up too and had a good job ect, financially stable ect, but know i’m not. it effects who we are and who we think. I’m not intending on being nasty, I also like you as a person and i think i’ve read some of you’re work in the past.I’m just a bit of a debator and sometim,es get frustrated when i think my veiw on stuff is not even considered. but we all live in our own world and thats also what makes us human.

I couldn’t agree more.  Sometimes I forget to acknowledge that I’m listening to other ideas, but I nodded my head at all of this.  Once humankind starts to see that we are all in this life thing together society in general will be better off.  I hope that will one day be a common place perception.

Thanks, I know. I’m an open book. Guess you could say it was a letter to all the aresholes who’ve contributed to ruining my life, including the ones who’ve recently been slandering me in my local pubs,because they’d worked out i might be abled to do something with singing. THey did it by slandering me, saying i was a thief/con woman in take a break magazine, none of which was true. I then was assulted and the police(when i called them blamed me), because the barman lied. I have a case with the IPCC who seem to be useless. Funny who the CCTV of my attack was wiped though and how the police changed the witnessess.

Its not to do with looks, its to do with long-term bullying, feel free to read a bit of the comment posted above yours, you’ll get a bit of why I feel like this. Thanks for the review.

laws of attraction has nothing to do with looks … its about the way we think , pos or neg ; there is a book written on the subject bout laws of attraction …

If people lie about and slander and assult you, because We have a talent they dont have(yet they don’t have the intelligence to realise they have talent I dont LOL) then it tends to make us negative about the human race. I’m not a fake person, If I’m happy, I make that clear, If i’m sad I make it clear too. People do pick up on this when I sing and you connect. Its called honesty and emotion, pretending you’re happy and up-beat 24/7 is not normal. THats the trouble with people know, they can be so fake.
today I met a couple of canny lads who I just started to pay to clean my windows, they were genuine honest hardworking guys with humour, they made me feel happier about the human race, but the arseholes who egged my windows , made me angry. Why should’nt I say when I’m sad or angry. or happy. its life. pretending where happy all the time is not normal in my eyes.
If we have suffered long-term bullying and more recently jealousy then of course where going to be pissed off and hating the world, whereas like those window cleaners if where talked to decently then yes we will be happy. Its how people treat each other and judge each other that can sometimes be the problem.

For instance when I chatted to the window cleaner about singing, he said, oh’ I love neil diamond, but I can’t sing really. I explained to him that because I do sing doesn’t mean that I judge, I go along to sing along and enjoy myself ,not judge. He got that. but others if i join in say i’m out singing them, because Err I sing I’m not supposed to join in or enjoy it, they get angry after a few bevvis.  that is their problem not mine. I’m not worried if they can’t sing well, as they’ll do stuff I can’t. But to attack and slander me in revenge, is obviously going to make me angry. I can’t change their singing ability , only they can do that, yet they chose to make my life hell and bugger up my opportunities to go proffessional. QAnd yes I did go most of the way with inbiz to get a grant to set up proffesionally, but after the slander and assult I could’nt do it where i’ve lived all of my life. THe police did not give me justice or protection after the assult, they believed the liars and convieniently lost the cctv that showed them singing with one of my attackers. obviously after that i’m not going to be attractive as you put it. Having my life ruined by liars is going to make me bitter and miserable, after all I can’t change what gossip the dwecent people out there chose to believe.

wtf … laws of attraction has AGAIN , NOTHING to do with appearance or looks ; I was just trying to be nice and say in laymen terms … “its how we think everyday in life whether or not its good or bad” if we constantly thinking negative , bad things will succumb to our thoughts (cause thats the way we perceive the outcome) and same for thinking positive ! It may be BS(laws of attraction – meaning we attract what we think) , but there is some degree of truth to that , so to speak . But , its good to vent too … best wishes !