Thank you very much. I’m flattered lol.
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Poetry / Emission Confession
Dammit! I think I'm in love with you,
And just as things were looking up.
I'm sleepless in my bed all night long,
With the disfigured feeling of love.
Innocent while waking, naughty during sleep,
Day dreaming, I hold you all day,
But, when the moon shines high my dear,
I have you in a more intimate way.
So, I'll dream of you until the oceans flood,
And wash our world away.
Whether awake of asleeep sweetheart,
I'm loving you in some way.
All I can do, darling, is pray that you
Are dreaming of me the same.
Even though you have another man,
Tonight, I'll have you again.
Innocent while waking and dirty during sleep,
Daydreaming, I kiss you all day,
But when you can see the moon in the lake,
I'll have you in that "extra somethin'" kind of way.
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musicalpoetry reviewed Version 1 -
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this being your second piece i’ve read, i see that you really pour emotion into what you’re writing. its beautiful to read something thats intimate. this was a wonderful, sweet piece of writing that would make me fall for any guy if he wrote me this :)
keep it up, you’ve got a lot of talent
much love
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ShadowHeadley reviewed Version 1 -
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Very nice I must say it is a touching sentimental piece full of love and adoration it flows well. I truly revel in its powerful words.
bunny_dreamer reviewed Version 1 -
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lol well ill date u if u wrote me that. it was truly sweet keep it up. oo and your really talented i hope to maybe see more work from u.
ConfusedSongwriter reviewed Version 1 -
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I really liked this one. I mean not only did you write something awesome, but you also really touched on something that happens a lot more than people like to admit. They don’t really like to talk about their first true love, which you did here. My favorite line was the very last line, the “extra something” kind of way. That is some this I really found enjoyable. I hope you continue to write.
Stumblesome reviewed Version 1 -
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Bittersweet. Please do make this a song, it would be a lovely one.
sukierain2u reviewed Version 1 -
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I like the references to the moon, the water and the night. You have a way of capturing the feeling of still being able to love a person who has moved on. It is sad that we can’t take our feelings and put them away as fast as some other species do. I enjoyed the flow and re-read this just to make sure I did really like it. (yes). I will look again for your work.
TravisMaximus reviewed Version 1 -
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Superb! I see some almost cliche terminology in there, but for the life of me I just can’t convince myself that I’ve read anything like it before.
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