Non-fiction / Where were you? (Analysis)
I was sitting in my sisters room listening to Abbey Road when she told me that John Lennon was dead. He had been that way for about two years.
My mother just pulled up to the curb at St Joseph’s church and we listened to the talk radio DJ speak of Andy Warhol’s death. She was driving a red Chevette back then.
I was shredding documents at the accounting office that employed me after school when I received the call from Matt that Kurt Cobain shot himself. My girlfriend visited me at work that day and we had sex in the basement file vault of the office.
It was a beautiful day in Chestnut Ridge when I decided to walk to my clients office with the new design proofs. Just as I was preparing to leave the house I caught the news report that informed the world of George Harrisons passing. It was still a beautiful walk.
Driving east on Venice Blvd the radio cut through my days monotony to inform me of Joe Strummers death. Kerry and I hung an article about him in our apartment later that day.
We had just reached the lowest point in Death Valley and decided to stop in a convenience store for some cold refreshments. As I walked through the door I looked down to my left at the first newspaper I saw. “Music legend Barry White dies” I bought an ice cream sandwich and a bottle of water.
My apartment was bright and sunny the moment I answered the phone and listened to my sister tell me that my brother was dead. I got in the car and drove to the beach and laughed hysterically with tears bleeding from my eyes the whole way.
Sitting in the dark of my home, staring at the screen of my computer in the middle of a winters night was when I found out I was dead. I wasn’t even a rockstar.
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I liked this for the different ways it may be interpreted. The question it most left in my mind was ‘Where were you when death actually mattered?’
I’d make sure to put a space between Joe Strummers and Barry White in order to fit with the staggering you’ve set up in this piece.
Overall, I like the way this leaves questions in your mind and the full impact of the last line is fantastic. Great piece.
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I thought this to be pretty good.
We follow the years as more and more famous people pass away until we wind up at the final scene. The setting of the final few lines works well in my opinion because it brings about a feeling of lonely despair that I’m sure a majority of the people on this earth feel.
Don’t know if you write poetry but this seems like a perfect outline for one. Or a song. The short ‘paragraphs’ seemed too disconnected. I realize they are time cuts. It’s that the pacing and rhythms are perhaps too staccato. I don’t know – my first instinct was I didn’t care much. But I just re-read it and maybe it’s just me. The creative line at the end is good. It too bothered me the first time, but the second pass I liked it. I also feel it’s the skeleton for something. Great content BTW.
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