Poetry / Roll that Beautiful Bean Footage (Analysis)

This sounds like you’re talking about a politician or maybe a mystery man.

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May 26, 2008

by cybertyger

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No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
3	57.1% (7 votes)	-2.6%

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
34	M	United States	September 23

Did you come to that conclusion solely from the word vote? I am talking about our President or the Antichrist, I cannot wait to revise this poem so people will be able to see what I am saying in it.

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Interesting. Nice rythmn, but no real point.  It seemed a bit tight and hard to search outh the message. The title made me think that it might be a parody of a popular commercial, but could not be certain.  I would suggest a little revision on the clarity.  Keep the attitude of it.  That was great!

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May 20, 2008

by cybertyger

personal info reviewer stats

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
3	57.1% (7 votes)	-2.6%

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
34	M	United States	September 23

The whole thing is about George Bush… the roll that beautiful bean footage was a commercial for “Bush’s baked beans”... so there is a hint right there.

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I found the mix of rhyme and free verse a bit jarring for this to be a comfortable read.  And that was disappointing as I wanted to really feel the flow of the subject matter.

Lines 3 and 4 did cause me to go back and reread as they sounded like lines from one of my pieces.

I like it. Sounds like it comes from the lips of experience.
I like the tone it sets for the one in Sadistic skin, the same one who lies when he grins. Tragic ending though, for “Birds need wings to fly- like dreams.”

Loved  the start of this poem, but overall it didn’t quite excite or intrigue me in the way of which I expected.  Maybe its me expecting too much – I don’t know, but can’t help think you could get something more from developing/re-mold of this piece.  Kindest intentions and thoughts.

A good poem about the suppression of free speach.  I especially like the line “Paper laws are goouging raw the eyes that saw.”

I think this is perfect for what you’ve got in mind. Sweet rhythm, very musical, so much so that it really doesn’t matter what the words are saying. And I mean that in a good way, really! Good luck with this.