Poetry / Serenity

Lovely imagery.  I think you are a good writer and will continue to grow. My suggestion is to seek out imagery/metaphors/similes that interesting and unusual – keep away from cliches. Don’t let your style be dominated by technique, let your writing speak for itself and it will gain authenticity.

even though you were only 14, this poem was and is amazing. i’m sure i’ve heard the feeling of nature described as a “glow” before, but never like that. it actually brought back the feeling of nature’s bliss as i sit here in my basment with freezing hands and feet. The ending seems so thought out too. Honestly and from my heart I know you could get a book of your own work. you are a born fucking writer! send me more.

I like this, it really does convay a sense of serenity, i like the imagery used and how its all nature related as if nature and the natural world are the only things that matter and no outside interferance should be let in.

I like the poem but the tittle makes me think of going to a AA meeting id change that but over all well written

My favorite line is “Roaring of its might.” Having grown up on Cape Cod, it made me feel like I was back on the beach. This poem is easy to read, and conveys a creative talent. I believe you will have your book, in time.

Little Whale

“All of these things,
whether they be gentle,
steady, mighty, warm, playful, or cheery,
signify something to me.”

all these things,
whether gentle, steady, warm or playful,
signify,
and i see myself…

...
something like this, where you might break from the pure listfulness of the work.