Poetry / Dear Mom, Im Dying

I don’t know if you remember my reviewing some of your other work.  I told you then how badly I feel.  I feel even worse now.  Depression takes hold and often doesn’t let go.  I am older than you by many years.  I have felt the things that you have.  I still battle every day with my emotions because I didn’t get the help I needed when I was younger.  The only “gift” or “review” I can give you, is think about getting help now.  Life goes by so quickly and before you know it, if you make it considering your self-destructive behaviors, you’ll be in your 30’s wondering what the hell happened???  I once again wish you luck and hope you listen to all of us who have responded.

This is real. It`s real life, in no way is it candy coated, and I like that. The last two lines are gripping, and for some reason, as simple as they are, they moved me almost as much as the whole piece did as a whole. For just being a letter to your mom, this is actually rather good.

I’m not writing this as a critique but just to encourage you to keep writing, to keep expressing yourself. By the way, I do see this as a poem because, poetry has many forms. None are wrong or right, or the best or the worst. We all express ourselves in different ways.

wow that was deep and truley upsetting i however know what your goin through i did the same thing when i was younger until i talked to a counselor at the high school that i had attended he taught me that i was and still am already skinny and beautiful but it didnt help at first then one night i turned to writing and it truley helped me whenever i thought that i needed to cut or force myself not to eat or throw up my food i wrote i sometimes wrote about absolutely nothing at all just to prove to myself that life isnt that bad and evidently we can deal with all the issues around us or they wouldnt be there trust me itll feel so much better to just talk about everything no matter how dumb the issue may be im cheering for ya you only get one life learn from the mistakes youve made and grow up a bit

this happens every day. You could even go into a certain meal you didn’t eat or fantasized about. Otherwise, great piece of….emotion.

Wow, this really was good. It came from deep emotion and that’s where some of the best things that we as humans can make (or at least that’s what I believe) One thing that’s really important for a piece of writing is that the reader feels how the author wants them to feel when they write something epic. I felt so many things when I was reading this and I think this is really great!

This is a real gut punch to mommy…though not delivering it to her is kind of like taking a swing at nothingness and connecting solidly…there might be some gratification there, in the release of the anger with the swing, but I suspect you might get a little more gratification from seeing the blood spill from mommy’s lips, the gray pallor of her face as the blood drained away, the sicknened feeling in her eyes, if you were to actually deliver this, give her the paper cut and watch the hemorrhaging.  And you can’t really begin to heal until the wound has been made.