why thank you pretty lady,,do you think its worth of publishing
Poetry / Elemental sex
elemental sex
She lay dry, barren and parched, for it had been many revolutions since her lover had given of himself to her. Yet deep within, the blood of her quickened for she felt the pulling, the longing, for he was coming. A general darkening all about announced his imminent arrival. A transformation from blistering and bright too sweltering and dim. she say far down around the curves of her body, the traces proclaiming his coming and his intent. the very air spoke of him, quiver with his pent passion, the fury of his desire not to be denied or contained. She exposes herself in anticipation, relishing the deluge she is about to experience. Accepting the violation and destruction, as price paid for the gift. Anticipating the moistening of the valleys of her body, with his life giving deeds. Unashamed of the lust in her, of the need. AND then he was upon her around her, surrounding her, his gust front disarraying the thick stalks of her hair. His voice thunder, reverberateing all around her, indistinguishable from her own moans. He caresses claws and gouges her with one hundred thousand watt fingers laying open her skin. she screams in excitement and the joy of surrender, as he lights fires across the body of her. to be extinguished when he falls upon her with his life giving moisture. the thing she needs to quicken her seed. to give life to their progeny, the heirs of this deed. And then when their passion will not for another moment be denied . From deep within himself he turns loose and drowns her, all of her with the essence of himself, that thing that makes him, that the giving of will diminish him. Create a small death, drain and exhaust him. But he can no more contain what is within him than she could refuse his gift. So the heavens of his body release his pent passion. She shudders in his cuming as his liquid seeps into every part of her. Into places never seen and merges with the womb of our mother. To Begin again that dance of life. Existing since before the arrival of man. the mating, merging, converging, Of Mother Earth and Father Sky. you have just witnessed a thunderstorm, as seen by the earth the sky and me
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libertine reviewed Version 3 -
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You must have been told a million times you have an aewsome way with words. I wont pick them all out because it will cost you too much in credits but “He caresses, claws and gouges her ” You can feel her anticipation and your heart speeds up as you read as youd imagen hers doing. You told me I’d like it ,and I surely do. Maybe I just have too many hormones? You’re right this version is the best. Easy to read , the flow is just right and keeps you reading until the climax ( excuse the pun )
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barbie79512 reviewed Version 3 -
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i really enjoyed this, i felt the passion between the two people, you have a gift for making sex seem sweet and passionate not dirty, cant wait to hear more from you…
BEN_ALI reviewed Version 2 -
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Have someone proof-read, and do a little cleaning up and it could certainly be published. I like poetry that pulls no punches, doesn’t justify it’s subjects in a sense of good or bad, and gets down to brass tacks like this one. Very vivid, almost hallucinatory. I like how you compared the anticipation, the event, and the aftermath to an electrical storm that builds with great energy and passes over, leaving nothing, er, untouched…
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