Lyrics / Keep On

I think this would make a great song. Great flow, could be a little easier reading. I have been told by a few musicians that songs should flow easily as if you were speaking to someone. I wish you lots of luck. Good lyrics. Gool Luck.

I thought that these lyrics were very good.  I don’t know if you wanted the rhyme scheme to remain constant throughout the entire piece or not but I thought I would just mention that it wavers a little bit.  However, I think that even though it wavers it still sounds really really good.  It makes sense and it came from the heart and actually, sometimes things are sweeter if they are just flat out said without trying to rhyme them with similar words.  Sometimes when we do that things just get too confusing.

Anyway, enough of my rambling.
Nice work.
I can’t find anything significantly wrong that I could give you constructive criticism on.
Keep writing and keep submitting.

You definitely do a great job of showing the debate going on in the speakers mind. I think it has a good flow and I really enjoy your chorus. Great job overall

Really good lyrics! I can feel the emotion put into these lyrics!

I like it personally when I read something that has some meaning and soul to it.

This piece of work has all that.

Keep it up!

                                                                   R.

There are so many songs, poems, stories and so on about love. I guess, after all, it is what makes the world go round. The song is fine.  If you want fine that is ok.  I would really like to see something about love with a brand new twist. Here’s what I think. I think you could take this song, and give it a brand new twist.  You seem to have the talent. Use your creative talent,to reflect yourself. Don’t be the tail of the dog, and always follow behind everyone else. The “tears” “the crying” .  Since I have no music to hear the cadence of the song, I cannot review that. You do have talent in my opinion. Just take it to the next level.

Very good write,it was easy to understand and flowed very well,it can sometimes be very difficult to write something fresh and new when there are so many songs done about winning the love of another,you have refreshed that.Good work.

try anoterh one this is a long way from Bowie. I suggest you read his lyrics to understand how to write lyrics.

I didnt realyl get off on this adn i did get my guitar out to try to wrap a tune around it

I can tell you it was hard and amusing.

try another one but dont give up

This is nice. It flows a little jaggedly, so I’d be interested to know how you formulated it into a song. The topic is a bit cliche, but this has plenty of heart to keep it going.

The first verse is a little choppy, but you can tell you found the rythmn later on. Pay attention to the syllibal placment. It’s rough trying to keep a constant beat in your head, I’ve dabbeled in it myself. Good deep lyrics, with a lot of thought involved. Kudos.

Kay man, I’m not an expert with lyric feedback but I can have to say that I wish I could hear this.

I love it. It’s really sweet. The lyrics don’t flow like “honey” or anything (gross, I can’t believe I just said that) but I think that’s what gives it an edge. Yeah, I’m done. I’ve read lyrics before and these are deep and emotional. Good work.