Poetry / Between silence and solace

An interesting piece.  I am getting what you are saying, but it was a bit difficult.  I would reword Tongue-tied and spirit bound I suffer to better capture the meaing of that stanza.  That one line seems a little out of place there.  I think I understand what you are saying there, I would play with the words to come up with a way to capture what you are saying in a way that fits the stanza.  Maybe Silenced and introspect I ponder.  Or something along those lines.  You are talking of the only time that you are feeling any kind of freedom or peace from the object of your passion and I feel your curent words there take away from it.  A decent job otherwise, well done.

very hot write  u passion was evident  espically liked the way u opened the poem and miserable chains  very hot great poem look 4ward to reading more from u

This is amazing. If I can figure out how to favorite it, I will. I absolutely love your setting and description. It uses elevated words without becoming unreadable, and I just love it.

Keep writing, if its all like this, then its amazing.

i liked all the mental visualizations ur style created while i read this piece.
Tongue-tied and spirit bound I suffer

i love this line and still have it rolling around inside my head. it is so easy to become ‘spirit bound’, caught up within our own perceptions and ourselves.

so many of us, if not all, are looking for that key to open us up. in my opinion though i do not think it can be found through another person.
in order to find peace and open up our souls we must come to peace with ourselves.

good writing here.

Your poetry is amazing, it’s the type of work you just want to keep on reading to find out what the end will say. You are a true poet. If you write this good, I want to know if your work is published anywhere so I can see more of it in print. In this piece you tell a story, a short story that lets the reader imagine what this person is saying. You’re descriptive in what you write that describe feelings and you do a wonderful job at it. I love this piece. Keep up the good work.

I can really relate to this!  
I love the line “Tongue-tied and spirit bound…”, and the idea of “Sing(ing) the songs of passion…”.
I like the image of “the dusk slowly settles like a blanket of darkness over the valley”, although it is a little cliche; perhaps creating a metaphor rather than a simile would help it sound more original—“the dark blanket of dusk settles lazily over the valley”?
Oh, how I can relate to those “miserable chains/That bind me to propriety and sanctity.”!
Nice work, overall!

this poem really invoked something in me when i read it. it reminded me of the loneliness one experiences at night, i think of sleeplessness and staring out of a window. i think of those times when you’re lying in bed, thinking of the great things you will do tomorrow, and then realising the next day you’ve achieved none of them, i particularly like the last  two lines – they give a sense of hope to what has preceeded.

This is such a potent piece. I love the last four lines… W-O-W!!!! Reading that part actually brought tears to my eyes.