Sci Fi & Fantasy / preface for book

I liked the tone and elocution of this piece but I wonder where it may lead us. Will the whole novel be under this journal format? If then, the reader might get bored of a one angle viewpoint on the story.
Nevertheless, I feel you have the start of a good concept. How and where you will take it will make it or break it. Good continuation. Want to see more!

I’m not going to nit-pick every single spelling or grammatic error, that’s what’s spell check is for.  Is the story going to be in first-person?  If so, I would probably leave out the details of the writers’ home world.  A strong prologue usually brings up questions that are later answered in the story instead of answering them at the onset.  I think, in most cases a prologue is usually not necessary, and this is most certainly not a preface, as that is usually a note from the author/publisher for additional insight into the work that we’re reading.  Nevertheless, if you insist on having a prologue, you’re headed in the right direction in the first paragraph.  You set up the first mystery that will be (hopefully) explained in the story, and that is…. where am I?  It allows the reader to start attempting to solve this mystery by continuing to read the story.  The second chapter leaves the present and takes us back to the narrator’s life before this sudden change.  I think this paragraph distracts from everything else because the shift from present to past is too sudden.  I would slowly work the information of the narrator’s home throughout the story instead of giving it to us all at one time.  Aside from that, it’s pretty cool.  I hope this helps.

I think that you are off to a great start.  It will be interesting to see where you are going with this. If you have written the first chapter then way to go.
There is only one thing that i want ot ask you… does your character know what their name is?  There wasn’t a distinct name that I could find.  Is your character a girl or boy? Child or adult?  These are questions that the reader shouldn’t have to ask.  You want to let us know.  If I read something, ususally within the first few pages, I am expecting to get to know a little about the main character.  Name, Age, General discription, that sort of thing.
keep up the great work and reply to this so that i can read some of your other stuff.
Maria2653

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January 21, 2007

by njal

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to answer your questions no they dont know there name or anything about them the mistery is ment to be there, and through the first chapter which i have written, soon to be up here once i have typed it up, the questions you asked are slowly revieled hope that help you.

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The concept of this story sounds like planet of the apes, they travel forward in time…and we know what happens. Not very original.

“Its now nothing more that a dust bowl where humans survive on a knife edge living out a meek exists with little hope of a better life all except the rich who at the expense of everyone else live a life of comfort and peace off world in the stations set up in space and on the moon when they realized the planet was doomed”

That sentence is way too long, i almost lost my breathe reading it….keep your sentences short, or the reader will drift off.

Its ok, nothing original or special.