Non-fiction / Drug Awareness Resistance Education - To Keep Humans From Looking 100 Years Older Than They Really Are
When I was in the 6th grade, I wrote a paper for our drug awareness program called D.A.R.E. I don’t remember exactly what I wrote, but I know that it was the best one in my 6th grade class. I remember because I got a t-shirt (which I wish I still had because I was fat in the 6th grade and I’m sure that it would still fit me now) and I had the opportunity to read it in front of half of the school (actually I had no choice). I didn’t go to each room and read this to each individual class, I read this on stage, in the cafeteria. I think I won because I talked about how I was in the sixth grade and overcame my drug habit of 10 years, the habit that started when I no longer drank baby formula and decided to hit up the water bong for the first time. I’m kidding, my parents probably would have went to jail for that, police don’t like to hear cool stories of 2 year olds getting stoned and laughing hysterically at Oscar the grouch having another one of his infamous tantrums. But I’m sure I made something up; I mean what twelve year old kid doesn’t have an imagination? Regardless, I thought it would be a good idea to revisit the drug issue 11 years later and see if I still have the drug advocacy paper writing talent in me (with the hopes that someone might forward this to McGruff the crime dog so that I might earn another shirt – or just so that someone might feel sorry for me and buy me one – either or – wink).
I’ve never really thought about it until now, but I don’t think the “just say no” phrase really helped anybody. Maybe it did, but I remember there being a lot of kids in high school who did drugs. Then again, maybe they didn’t go to my elementary school and get a chance to listen to my awesome drug free paper, in which case, I apologize. And if somehow, you did do drugs growing up and are reading this now, just remember that all I had back then was a bike so I couldn’t go from school to school. Also remember that I was fat and lazy, I was the kid who couldn’t pass the physical challenge in p.e. class during the first 3 tries (where you had to run a certain number of laps in a certain number of minutes), I always went straight home after school, and didn’t really do much in my spare time.
But I think the “just say no” message should have included a lot more information. I was one of the lucky ones I guess. I never had an encounter like the ones they would show in the video. You know, the encounter where the kid comes across a group of 3 guys who are smoking a joint. The bystander realizes the group sees him and becomes paralyzed as fear permeates his demeanor. The outspoken, extroverted kid of the group asks the individual (who has now peed in his pants) if he wants to take a hit to which the individual replies “no thanks”, prompting a stopping point for the health instructor to begin discussion with the class. What they don’t prepare you for is the likelihood of being called a wuss, sissy, or any other name that strips a male from his masculinity. I always wanted to see the video where a kid comes across a group of druggies who are tripping on acid, are hungry, and think the kid is a giant turkey leg. I think that would have been a little funnier. I always wanted to see a scenario like that and learn what to do if someone had thought that I, was in fact, a turkey leg. I’m willing to bet that the “just say no” phrase wouldn’t have worked. “No you can’t eat me….but how about a square of that acid? It seems like your in a video game and I like video games.”
Childhood is easy. As you get older it seems that drugs are more available, mainly because people make their own money and because a lot of people hate their lives. But whatever the reasons, there are more temptations to indulge. Having said all of this, I don’t know what the appeal is about methamphetamines. It is possibly the most 100% fool proof, guaranteed way of becoming the ugliest, skinniest, most crack headed looking human being that your current self is capable of becoming. Frequent use of meth makes you look 100 years older than you actually are, causes you to lose teeth, hair in some cases, produces sores, and folds your lips to make you look like you don’t have those 4 teeth left. And in some cases you’ll probably grow one ugly ass moustache.
By the looks of things (I’m being literal), meth appears to make you a lot dumber as well. Maybe people lose teeth because they forgot what toothpaste actually does prevent gingivitis, their hair may become stringy because they forgot which shampoo really is volumizing, and they may have ratty haircuts because they think the Flowbee really DOES produce style, while saving them money in the long run. Maybe they didn’t trade in their clothes for halter tops and biker shorts after all, it might just be that the last part needed to complete their meth lab came from their washing machine’s 20 dollar motor. I’ll give meth-heads the benefit of the doubt, it’s the least I can do.
Look, I don’t care what kind of drug it is. If something made me look like this I better have an ability to fly, become invisible, read minds, be psychic, have superhuman strength, make time stand still, or exhibit an uncanny ability to transport. If that were the case then I may be tempted to do meth. But until then, I think I’ll value my teeth, my healthy cheeks, my average looking haircut, and the muscles I do have.
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I wasn’t sure what type of feedback you were looking for – but overall, this is a very good piece of writing.
Small grammatical issues, nothing a spell/grammar check won’t find.
I like your overall out look and take on drug use. And the slight humorous take helps make it sound less preachy since people tend to stop reading as soon as they think they are being told something they should know.
People amuse me ;-)
Well done!!
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