Poetry / Death

I would like to know how you feel about death? what was this friend like who died? How did you feel when he died? paint some images of people questioning death, maybe create a character whom we could relate to and see as ourselves. otherwise good form

The first sentence confused me.  

“You’re Dyeing Year…your dead”  You’re means you are…so I think you should switch these two around, unless of course the last one is supposed to mean my dead.  And dyeing as you spelled it is dyeing your hair or a pair of shoes, it should be dying.  I understand that you wanted to accentuate the words by capitalizing them, but so many seems overbearing.  

It’s rough to lose a friend, and I get the feeling of chaos that accompanies such a loss in this piece. But you seem to be asking many questions…I would rather you have answered a couple.  Good Luck!

First off, I’m sorry for the death of your friend.  Death of a close one always spawns creativity – it’s a good emotional release.

Your poem needs work, but it doesn’t mean it needs to be destroyed to fix.  

I think the text would sound better if you picked one topic – keep it either as an address to your friend, or as a contemplation on the nature of death, but not both…it doesn’t seem to work.

Spelling error, and grammar in the first line: “dying” is the correct spelling, and you’re mixing “your” and “you’re” – a bane for any editor…”You’re” is the contraction for “you are”, and “your” is possessive…
ex. “You[’]r[e] Dy[e]ing Year, Your Dy[e]ing Day, Your Dy[e]ing Hour, Your Dy[e]ing Minute, You[‘]r[e]  Dy[e]ing Now, and You[‘]r[e] Dead.”  

incorrect grammar: “still alive [are] yet to know.” – should be “have” yet to know.

Also, I suggest you put a comma after: “If so” – ex. “If so, then that means…”

I hope all this helps…I’m sure you weren’t thinking of proper grammar and spelling while you were writing this..who can?  when a friend has passed.