Poetry / Conditional Kindness

CONDITIONAL KINDNESS

I aim to befriend
a lonely child,
the kind who spends their playtimes
staring at brick walls.

I know how it is,
to be pushed down
for daring to stand up.

My potential prodigy;
crying out for recognition
on the sidelines of the
football pitch,
needing only to be nurtured.

But they’re all so wary,
some lacking gratitude,
throwing stones
or dirty looks;

some mistaking my extended
hand of friendship
for an unexploded bomb.

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Reviews

June 10, 2007

freesixty

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
0	100.0% (7 votes)	0.0%

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Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
21	F	United Kingdom	April 14

freesixty reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

I really like this poem, the language is quite simple, but it doesn’t need to rely on complicated language to get across the message. My interpretation is that it represents the fear in most people to be recognised as intelligent or talented, particularly in school. I normally dislike poems which don’t rhyme, but with this one the rhythym more than compensates.

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April 02, 2007

ae

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
164	78.8% (85 votes)	18.6%

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47	F	Bonita Springs, FL	January 16

ae reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

Wow. That whole poem is an unexploded bomb.

Nothing too complicated, but the starkness of the plain truth is pretty friggen complex. The crisp, clean language is actually a relief given the gravity of the subject.

The title hurts me. Doesn’t hurt the poem, just me.

Very well done.

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April 03, 2007

by Raef

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
254	89.3% (56 votes)	54.3%

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23	F	United Kingdom	January 24

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Thanks very much for your generous review. So, you personally didn’t like the title…or you think it works, but in a sad way?

April 03, 2007

by ae

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
164	78.8% (85 votes)	18.6%

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
47	F	Bonita Springs, FL	January 16

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No, it works in that sad way. It takes some thought, tho, and then … the ache. Ouch.

I have two of those kids. Not really. Mine were still so little when I got them. Not too much mileage on them, not like these veterans. To engage is to know that the best you can offer them is a window on possibility. Temporary love, knowing it’s temporary. Still, it must be done. You must do it.

Tnx.

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