Haiku/Senryu / Pure Frustration

Christmas time again
Presents waiting to be wrapped
In all shape and size

Supplies lay waiting
Bows in red, green, white, and blue
Sparkle in the light

Paper shines brightly
Decorated with patterns
Of Santa and snow

Reach for a package
Carefully estimate size
Cut big enough piece

Fumble for the tape
While holding the paper tight
Afraid to let go

Tape slips from your grasp
Paper crinkles with danger
Under the pull’s force

Without warning, rip
The paper gives way and tears
Goodbye perfection

Groan in frustration
Hole smugly stares back, taunting
Time for patch up job

Survey handy work
The sight of wrinkled paper
Unbearable mess

Wonder what to do
Shiny bow offers no help
Should you start over?

Sighing heavily,
Unwrapping with reluctance
Process starts again

It is hours later
Scraps of paper and ripped bows
Litter the floorboards

Clean up seems endless
Now know why people prefer
Those nice, pre-wrapped gifts
Promise yourself that at least
Next time you’ll use bags

Wish you’d bought giftcards

Reviews

December 30, 2006

VioletL

REVIEW QUALITY: 100.0%(1 vote ) personal info reviewer stats

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
493	81.2% (133 votes)	38.2%

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
66	F	Baconton, GA	September 15

VioletL reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

I think you did an outstanding job!~Oh, btw your first lines of the first two have six syllables. Also, the last line of the first. In theory, Haiku don’t rhyme, so maybe shift your colors in  number two. Your images are great and you’re really in tune with what must be a universal experience.  The old tradition in poetry, as I remember it from the Dark Ages, is that ALL lines start with caps.  Maybe the original programmer is as old as I am?

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December 31, 2006

by IrishMagic

personal info reviewer stats

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
31	90.0% (10 votes)	87.3%

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
18	F	North Kingstown, RI	November 30

Thanks so much for the kind words!  I was so worried about how it had turned out.  Also, thanks for pointing out the extra syllabuls.  I must have been to tired to notice!  I’ll definitely have to fix that.  Yeah, I thought I’d heard somewhere before that all the lines in poetry start with caps, so you’re not alone there.  I’ve just noticed that some people tend to criticize the capitalization, and I wasn’t sure which way to do it.  It turns out my word processor decided for me, and, like I said, I was too lazy to change it, so I just left it the way it was.    

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