Poetry / dreams

Floating across the misty sea
There my dreams do lie
Safe from this world’s tyranny
I shall never let them die

Dreams inspire my yearnings
Without them life is empty
But I continue learning
More and more about me

Everyone wants me to change
But I’m not a perfect person
To them I seem so strange
For all that I’ve ever done

But that’s the path that I have chose
And I’ll follow it where ever it goes

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Reviews

June 22, 2007

blackrosemage

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
101	85.7% (70 votes)	38.7%

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Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
19	F	United States	October 28

blackrosemage reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

This personal poem, or in my opinion, is a meritorious piece. It reveals to the readers a sense of wanting to be heard and desire to remain the way you have become. I like the first and third lines of the first stanza. Overall, a great poem and I believe publishable material as well as true thoughts, emotions, and messages.

>Suggestions:
“Dreams inspire my yearnings”...last word is awkward in a way, kind of messes with flow in my opinion.

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June 16, 2007

emilyrhodel

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
0	40.0% (15 votes)	100.0%

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Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
16	F	United States	August 10

emilyrhodel reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

wow! How old are you? this is good! I love the part where it said
“Everyone wants me to change
But I’m not a perfect person
To them I seem so strange
For all that I’ve ever done”
you can realy realy realy realy realy realy realy realy realy realy realy realy realy realy relate to this poem! its very well written and I get what your trying to say!
keep writing!!
good luck!!