Poetry / Baby Girl
She dreams a surreal dream
Of lavender and green
And something that’s more stable.
She’s ironed out the folds
And now she’s working on the wrinkles.
I can see she’s going to be
The woman that she is meant to be.
It’s so wonderful being here
Watching her sleep so peacefully.
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Maybe try to establish the relationship between the person watching the woman and the woman. or delve deeper into the woman’s emotions etc.
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Nice rhyme scheme – because of the words you chose, it doesn’t slap you in the face. This seems like a segment of a poem at least twice as long. You might want to consider adding another stanza or two with the same theme. This is a fun poem and it’s nice to see some happy, hopeful poetry on here. A breath of fresh air.
Sounds like she is lucky to have a caring mother.
Sweet
What about the tense?
I like the rhyming scheme of the poem. I also like the structure. And unlike some poems I’ve read before, this poem didn’t make me fall asleep. Good job!
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