Thank you. At least some people got what I was trying to say. Others did not, so apparently it’s still a little too obscure for some. I have to admit I’ve gotten both positive and negative feedback on this one. I need to streamline it a bit as it is a bit long for the purpose, and maybe that will help those who aren’t getting it.
Poetry / Who I Am
Why must I apologize
for being White,
for being Anglo/Saxon,
for being Protestant.
WASP is what I am.
Why must I apologize
for being “cracker,”
for being “gringo,”
for being “paleface,”
for simply being,
WASP is what I am.
Why am I to blame
for what my ancestors
have done to yours?
Trail of Tears, Manifest Destiny,
Executive Order 9066, Slavery.
WASP is what I am.
My father’s nappy African hair,
My sister’s almond-shaped Asian eyes,
My niece’s dark Hispanic beauty,
My stubborn straight hair and
Native American hooked nose.
WASP is what I am.
I am African.
I am Asian.
I am Hispanic.
I am Native American.
But because of the color of my skin,
WASP is what I am.
It isn’t, and never was, about apologizing.
It isn’t, and never was, about blame.
I am the oppressor.
I am those I oppress.
WASP is what I am.
It’s about understanding one another
and resolving our enmity.
It’s about celebrating our differences.
It’s about NOT tolerating,
but ACCEPTING our differences.
It’s about being who we are,
without feeling shame.
It’s about being who we are,
without shame being forced upon us.
It’s about being who we are,
not who we are told we must be.
It’s about our shared Humanity.
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Fenvy reviewed Version 1 -
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This is as clear as a meaningful message will be given. Your piece is very focused and the repetition makes everything much more dramatic. I like the comparison of oppressed and oppressor, if you oppress you’ll be oppressed at the same time in the eyes of people. It’s what we do today that counts, the past is used as an example of the terrible things humans are capable of doing to other humans. Great message, it’s all tied so well together with the final stanza. Excellent writing.
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JadedSparrow reviewed Version 1 -
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Bravo is the first word that comes to mind. I was excited by the first few lines. This piece reminded me of one that I did a few years ago. Honestly I couldnt have said it better myself. All too often we, not you or I , but we as a society get so caught up in perpetuating the hate of our past. I wish more people could have the outlook which you do. Hell I wish everyone breathing was required to read this piece. I enjoyed it thoroughly, so again I say Bravo.
Bosco reviewed Version 1 -
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Hello,
I don’t know what to say! Your poem is very funny. It’s a real “I’m not racist but…” kind of poem. As to the content you seem a bit confused. Why does learning about the context of a piece of writing make the speaker feel guilty? Does the teacher tell the student to feel guilty? I doubt it, the speaker is right, there is no need to feel ashamed for things that he personally was not involved in. So why is he on the defensive?
Poetically your poem is very cliché. I am African, Asian etc. What are you trying to get across? Is it that White people should not feel guilty about a history of oppression? That’s a silly message. Guilt is something we inflict on ourselves, nobody can make you feel guilty.
This review will probably annoy you – I’m not being critical of you as a person, merely stating my opinion on the poem. I’ll be quite happy to follow up in the comments if you have some counter arguments, maybe I misread the poem or misunderstood something vital.
Bosco.
phalanx149 reviewed Version 1 -
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Awesome read. Definitely a loaded topic. I’m sure this will piss off many more people then it will give sollice to. It’s about time somebody wrote something like this. I understood it perfectly and it seemed to cover the perspective of the issue very well, with emotional impact. I like how you included your mixed heritage in the poem – I was not expecting that. The end was predictable, but delightfully so. It’s one of those endings where you know what’s coming, but the journey toward the ending is so well done that it doesn’t matter and the poem still feels fresh. ”It’s about NOT tolerating,/but ACCEPTING our differences.” Excellent line – I’v enever heard it described that way before, and it is so true. I felt “It’s about being who we are,/without shame being forced upon us.” felt…well, forced. I think using “being” in the refrain, and then using it in the changing lines, is jarring. Maybe take “being” out so it reads “It’s about being who we are,/without shame forced upon us.”? A good read, none-the-less.
squarehopper reviewed Version 1 -
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I love the idea. But it is very bogged down with the pounding and shoving of it down our throats.
If you remove the extra layers and the repetiveness, this is what it boils down to:
Why am I to blame
for what my ancestors
have done to yours?
Trail of Tears, Manifest Destiny,
Executive Order 9066, Slavery.
WASP is what I am.
My father’s nappy African hair,
My sister’s almond-shaped Asian eyes,
My niece’s dark Hispanic beauty,
My stubborn straight hair and
Native American hooked nose.
But because of the color of my skin,
WASP is what I am.
I am the oppressor.
I am those I oppress.
Everything else was just filler to me. It didn’t add meaning or value to above message.
But this is just my opinion of course and you need not take it.
aquaruischick reviewed Version 1 -
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This is a grea poem. What does WASP MEAN? I cannot figure that out.. I like how you voiced your opinion. Did you write this poem from a life experience?
THis should be published.
sirM reviewed Version 1 -
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Well, your central idea about the speaker embodying the heritage of many ethnic groups literally and metaphorically, as you point out in the last line’s “shared humanity,” is intersting enough to drive a poem. I am tired by the repeated use of common diction though. Some of the rage, some of the insights, it seems to me really deserve a more elevated use of language for a poetic format. This leads me to an ironic comment, given your rebellious theme. The poets who can be the best to research on this front tend to be ethnic, Mya Angelou and Lanston Hughes being the tip of the iceburg, the former’s “I Am Woman” coming quickly to my mind as a great example of a poem that manages defiance in a forcefully poetic way, encorporating word sounds with common language (if that is your intended preference here) to explode a bomb of a poem. Your sixth stanza strikes me as a good example also. Notice how much more compelling you’ve made the phrasing there in comparision to the monotone of the rest.
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