Poetry / in your garden i will stay a guest

There is a beautiful innocence to you in this poem. Like you know your growing up, or something like that. i guess not growing up, i dont even know your age. But your poetry speaks volumes. Whose garden is this? it sounds like a beautiful piece, like the days I love here in Madison WI. In the sun, or in the Rain. i would throw some heavier vocabulary on it. it makes it sound more refined. im not one to talk though, most of my poems are inspired forms of Hip Hop. But i like the classical style of poetry you have. Ok now for what i didn’t like… There isnt much i dont like though. ok what is it your wanting? Is it another guy? is it a friend? or an old family member? is it love, or completion your desiring? how is a “gentle path” a “daunting thought.” That seemed like a misplaced expression in my sense. How does that make you reluctant upon your feet. When you write,

                    ”the daunting thought of a gentle path
                     makes me reluctant to get up on my feet
                     i ought to begin my journey though,
                     the sweet scents of the flourishing tulips in your garden
                     heat up my yearning for the mountains.

So the place your seeking is in the mountains and is a garden. So the mountain path is gentle, yet daunting. I guess im wondering where the focus of this paragraph is. it seems that every sentence is a different subject, that somehow makes sense with every other sentence. its like a puzzle that you piece together as you read the poem. I liked that part about reading your piece. That was a good poem. Please feel free to critic my work, id like to hear your opinion. Peace Juan