Well, thanks for the feedback on paragraphs 2 and 3. On the comment about reposting it, I think I addressed that pretty thoroughly in the notes to the reviewer section, did they not show up? Remember that once you start to review something you can always hit “skip it” if you see from the reviewer notes that it’s just not for you…
Non-fiction / 4 out of 5 men make up statistics... time, rants and raves
4 out of 5 men make up statistics…
Ah, time, my greatest enemy. Cool, calm killer of people and planets. Inexorable, relentlessly moving forward, moved only by gravity. Immune to emotion or remorse over the destruction that lies in your wake, never looking back except through the echoes of the memories that you slowly wipe away as well. And yet, you bring as gifts, to those with patience, wisdom and peace… does time heal all wounds?
Age is a terrible price to pay for wisdom.
I’m so out of it today. I feel like I’ve been in a fog all day… so, of course I’ve been goofing off on here when I should be working… It was fun, I haven’t taken time to browse random people’s profiles and blogs in months. I sent out lots of random messages. If you were a recipient and feel like writing back feel free, or then again, feel free to ignore me ;-)
The other day I… no, that was someone else.
I hate it when I think of something that I am really psyched to write about and then because of my sleep deprived state I totally space it and can’t remember. But then again, it’s the half drunk sleepless state that breeds so many of my wackiest ideas.
There is some surprisingly good writing out there in people’s blogs. I wonder if I’ll ever sit down and finish any of the various things that I’m writing currently and try to get something published…? Maybe I should rewind the clock back to being a waiter and call myself a writer/starving artist. That would be fun but I’m too far down the river for that now. I’ll have to do it the brute force way and carve more time out of the already too short day. Who needs sleep anyway?
Seriously though I’m having the most fun I’ve had in years. It always gets worse before it gets better… well it’s been a lot worse so maybe this really is the getting better part. I have always been the chose to laugh not to cry sort and some say I’m overly optimistic since I am usually able to find happiness in any situation but this is truly an engaged and exciting time… I’m looking forward to hitting the water, the freefall was worth it.
I’ve been in touch with some old friends lately after mostly falling off the map and it’s been really great reconnecting. Very life affirming to re-extend the connection and rebuild the web, or to find that it was never destroyed just left unused but always there to fall back upon. The new friends are also an unexpected joy, far more fulfilling that I had even hoped for, me the optimist.
I’m even starting to feel like I’m getting back in shape. Guilt free workouts are definitely a bonus that I’m enjoying. Been hitting some new PB’s lately and am feeling like if I can get the weight and fitness where I want it I will actually roll the clock back about 10 years. And this, my own little homemade personal prozac has its own rewards.
Well enough ranting, I’ve gotta finish some chores and try to catch up on my sleep.
Bonne nuit à tous, je vous aime tellement, faites de beaux rêves!
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falconviews reviewed Version 1 -
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This 351 word review has not been unlocked.
jrnapoli reviewed Version 1 -
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I think this is more of a journal entry then anything else, designating something as non-fiction implies a plot, some action, charactors, perhaps.
The title is very good, it has actually given me some great ideas for my own writing. Everything after that is just a void. I really don’t want to read someones complaints about being unable to write and feeling drowsy.
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Champ99 reviewed Version 1 -
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I’d start here: “I’m having the most fun I’ve had in years. It always gets worse before it gets better… well it’s been a lot worse so maybe this really is the getting better part.” Then I’d give examples of why you’re having fun. We get the overall picture but maybe some examples. What freinds did you meet? What kinds of conversations did you have? The piece is ery warm and inviting. I like the tone and the commentary it makes on blogging itself. It’s an interesting piced in that it is a blog about blog.
Needs some conflict. Get us top pulling for the narrator. Have something happen on line that changes his perspective a bit.
Nani reviewed Version 1 -
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Well, I have to say I think you should repost this in the other category. As I perused the opening paragraphs I was interested, really liked it, then the rest of it was just a rambling blog entry, a combination of random thoughts that don’t make a whole. This may be standard fare for journal entries but I am not a reviewer of that genre so I will keep my comments focused only on paragraphs two and three: good job.
vruja reviewed Version 1 -
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Very good writting (grammar etc.). I can relate very much to the themes in this blog, like I could have written it myself. Your thoughts on time and optimism are insightful and feel very real to me.
thompenn reviewed Version 1 -
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That was amusing… Wow… That sentences sounds extremely lackadaisical, but I guess you can understand. It was funny and good luck with the whole… ’in shape thing’... When I say PB I thought where is the jelly? Good read.
DCAllen reviewed Version 1 -
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Got to be Freckleface?? Tell me it’s you, girl. If you’re not Freckleface, take this review as a compliment. Your writing shows a keen mind. Excellent stuff.
Proofreading note:
I have always been the chose to laugh (typo here?)
jackwriter reviewed Version 1 -
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This is belongs in blogging, not non-fiction. This is not even writing, it is just rambling. In the first paragraph you say that time is moved by gravity? That doesn’t make any sense. Then you pose a cliche as a question (which is bad enough): “does time heal all wounds”, but you never bother to make any attempt at answering, or at the very least, addressing this question. You also over-use ellipses way more than you need to. I feel like you want comments on what you wrote about though (yourself), and not the writing itself. If this is the case, then you need to put this into a different category.
robertryburn reviewed Version 1 -
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Your who,what,when,where,why,how and feel are all there.
Your words can be felt by the reader.
You keep up the good work and keep writing because you are already a writer.
chrry81 reviewed Version 1 -
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Hi! I really liked your piece. it’s a very nice inner monologue and although those sometimes can get boring or confusing i found yours clear and amusing.
I don’t really grasp the meaning of the title, maybe it’s just a radom thing or i didn’t pay attention to something, anyways it’s not important. I hope you do finish your current writtings and share them with us.
good luck and au revoir
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