Children's / My Journey with Webster

First off, my name is Webster you see, and I’d like to take you on a journey with me.

Let me take you to a magical place.  Full of mystery and magical grace.

A place where there is fairies, elves and much more.  Just grab my hand, and we’ll fly out the door.

We’ll skip along the rainbow, until we reach the end.  Then we’ll follow the golden lane through the winds and spins.

When we reach the magical creek, the fairies will lead the way.  The most helpful creature in this land I would have to say!

“This is it!  We have reached the creek!  Where are the fairies that we seek?”

“They sleep a great deal.  We must wake them up!”

With that, Webster whistles and claps his hands once.

Then what did I see out of the corner of my eyes, a million fairies that flew through the sky!

There are boys and girls, and old ones at that!  There are pink ones and blue ones, and ones that are fat!

The fairies have lead us to the most unusual spot full of mushrooms with pink and blue dots.

Hop along the mushrooms.  There is nothing to fear, but watch out for those grittles!   They are not as nice as they appear.

What is a grittle!  You wonder and ask.  Playing games and making jokes is their only task.

What is the harm?  I have wondered that too.  Often the games and the jokes are on you!

Well what do I watch for?  What will I see?  What will a grittle look like to me?

Other than bright colors, there’s not much to see but a big ball of hair with small hands and feet.
Now we must go, we have much we must see.  Come along my friends and follow me!

Just jump on the mushrooms.  You will fly through the air.  Our first stop of fun is right over there.

The secret passage is through that giant tree, to the village of fruggles that await you and me.

Look they are waiting to greet us and play.  Lets have some fun, what do you say?

A fruggle is fun, oh much fun indeed!  You will sure love a fruggle if fun’s what you need!

Let us bounce on the mushrooms and fly through the air.  Let’s splash through the water, and land over there.

We’ll dance with the fruggles, and spin round and round. We’ll do flips through the air, and bounce off the ground.

Where should we go?  What should we do next?  The enchanted forest…that would be best!

There is the path!  We shall follow it through.  Look who it is, it’s our friend Frou!

“You’re just in time if you want to play! You couldn’t have picked a better day!”

“I’ve created a new gadget I would like you to see.  It’s right this way if you will follow me!”
“I bet you’re hungry coming all of this way.  Have any of you eaten anything today?”

“Come, sit down, and pull up a seat.  Now tell me exactly what you’d like to eat!”

“Would you like a sundae with sprinkles on top, plus a million different cakes to taste test and swap?”

“I want some cookies with chocolate chips too, along with a mountain of candy bars Frou!”

“With a push of a button you’ll get just that!  Then a wiggle, and shake, and a turn of my hat!”

Then all of a sudden, the machine began to
shake.  Then out of the slot came a magnificent cake!

While we were eating we heard a loud roar, and out popped candy and chocolate galore!

Just as Frou said, there was cookies and cake, an impossible amount for us three to intake.

Soon there was a mountain of cookies and pie; they stacked out the chimney as high as the sky!

The suns coming up and the gate will soon lock and nothing will open it, not even a knock!

Then you will be trapped in this far away land.  We must be off, grab my hand!

“Thank you Frou for the fantastic sweets I don’t think I’ve had such wonderful treats!”

“Goodbye dear friends, have a safe trip, the slide would be fastest if you want a quick tip.”

Do you see that big mountain? We shall fly to the top, and that my dear friend is our final stop.

This never-ending slide goes right through the forest.  I have found out this way is definitely the surest!

You can choose the best way you wish to slide.  On your back, or your bottom, even on your side!

Close your eyes. What do you see?  Home you say? Then home you’ll be!

We shall see you tomorrow night or so it may seem, when you lie down and enter your dreams.  
  

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April 24, 2008

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April 21, 2008

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April 11, 2008

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Joel avatar General Stranger

March 28, 2008

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Pg1,

I think you should drop the ‘First off’, in my experience this sets a scolding tone. You otherwise don’t talk to children using these words.

‘There’s’ should be there are. Drop the contraction. I don’t think contractions are proper for children’s books.

‘we cannot waste’ more scolding?

“…sudden to out wandering…” makes no sense to me.

Pg2,

Need caps on the proper names.

“…finished a new invention…” kind of a complicated thought for this kind of story. Not necessarily bad though.

It is a nice children’s story.  I can’t say that I know much about the subject though.

Hope that helps,

Joel.

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kortneyrose

Age: 25
Loc: Ada, OH
Gen: F
Last Login: May 27
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