You are very kind. Thank you so much.
Peace,
Wild Heart
Journal, Diary, & Blogging / Feeling the American Spirit
This is Independence Day. I have always loved this day and all that it represents. I remember as a child attending a private school we all stood out under the flag each morning to say the Pledge of Allegiance with our hands on our hearts. The American flag was treated in a very specific manner. It was understood that at no time would the flag touch the ground. When the flag was lowered that too was done in a sort of ceremonial manner. I watched closely and knew how important that American flag was to everyone in my environment.
During the time that I was attending All Saints Episcopal School ; Our American soldiers were fighting and dying in Vietnam. My Dad was an Air Force Navigator who flew back and forth to Vietnam, and other places in the world that I had never imagined could exist. My mother was very quick to sit me in front of the television when the President was speaking, or to see what was happening in Vietnam, and then we had NASA doing things that were amazing. The 60’s and early 70’s were a time that stayed within my spirit. I saw and heard so much. I was a deep thinker for a child but I was exposed to educated and interesting people from an early age.
I remember sonic booms, that were so loud and had such a vibration that the paintings and sculptures on the walls shook. The air raid sirens that sounded every Saturday at noon were loud, very loud. One began then another joined in from another direction, and so on. It was incredibly loud and terribly confusing. These were things that became a lifestyle. At school we had drills not just for possible fires but in case of an air assault. We were taught that when a signal sounded we were to get under our desks and to curl up as tight as we could. We knew what drills were, we became used to them, but thankfully we never had to experience the reason for a drill the drill never became a reality. The children in Vietnam couldn’t say that.
Every once in a while someone other than my Grandfather Hughes who called me his “princess” would come to Phoenix to visit, (which always called for a huge celebration and always at a very elegant dinner); My Uncle John came! Uncle John was loud and talked a lot, it seemed that all the “grown ups” had all eyes on him. He was a large man and I could feel his importance. As I got older I knew Uncle John was a West Point graduate who had a roommate named Eisenhower, and a close friend named George (Patton). My Great Grandmother Uncle John’s sister didn’t approve of George because he swore too much. I wouldn’t have known it if he was swearing, I was just awed by my elders.
I have fourteen family members buried at West Point, some died as heroes in World War l ,some in World War ll. Some of them are buried there as the wives who kept the home and family going while the men were gone defending The United States. Uncle John was a founding father of NATO. If I knew then what I know now, I could have learned so much more. If I had been just a few years older..
Each decade has been interesting and ever changing in this country. A turning point in the 60’s that I can remember parts of, and the early 70’s when music was changing fast and Led Zeppelin landed in the USA, and it was just the usual thing to hear rock on the local radio stations, and at the same time I was taken to watch the London Philharmonic, or the Boston Pops. Music had become instrumental as it were….
It was 1997 when my maternal Grandmother passed away. I had been very close to her all of my life and she was my last grandparent to pass. It was very difficult. In September of 1997 one of my Aunts, my Mother and two cousins flew to New York. It was my first trip to New York and we stayed in Manhattan. But it wasn’t the city that grabbed me. I was awed by the sight of The Statue of Liberty. Our plane was landing and we went right over her, I lost my breath, and then I wept. I felt the American Spirit.
The following day we took a harbor cruise past Ellis Island where my forefathers came to this country before the civil war. Where my forefathers on my paternal side came here from Ireland only two generations before I was born. Then the boat made a turn and I looked straight up at the Twin Towers. I was amazed at all of the buildings and how tall they were and I took photographs like a good tourist would…but I never would have imagined what was to come in just a few years later.
The following day our family got into an SUV and traveled north to West Point Military Academy. Upon arrival we were saluted and brought to a van where we are driven to the West Point Cemetery.. I was in a different world completely. A place so rich in American history that I could feel it in my very being. It was the American Spirit. I had known this feeling and with growth I had come to have more of an understanding than I had as the little girl under a desk in a drill. This I understood. A very bittersweet day. Our family laid my Grandmother to rest beside her parents at West Point where they had wed in 1912 at the Academy chapel under the swords held up by fellow cadets.
I stood at the edge of the Hudson river and tried to visualize the soldiers taking the huge chains under the water to keep the Brits from invading. That was a true piece of brilliance. I visited the grave sites of my elders, I felt a myriad of emotions. I felt pride as an American citizen. I watched cadets practice martial arts, and the football team practice, this is a place that is hard to describe with words, though I felt it deeply.
The year was 2004 and I was living on a peaceful ranch in Florida. The news was on and informing myself and my father in law that hurricane Frances was now a warning and not a watch. The news casters stated that volunteers were needed for shelters throughout the area that I was living in. We were expected to get hit very hard. The volunteers that were needed happened to fall right into the lap of my skills. Though I was a desert rat from Arizona that never sees rain I was about to experience a huge hurricane. I decided that I could be a victim or I could go to work. I opted to make a phone call that the news was giving out that led me to the head of the American Red Cross for that area. I was asked to grab what I needed and go straight to Osceola Middle School. I arrived there and was issued a badge and some forms, a box of supplies and told that I was to manage the “special needs” building. That this particular building had a generator. I began alone for the first 40 hours signing people in and trying to figure out my job! My partner a paramedic named Chris finally showed up…I was trying to keep calm knowing that the hurricane was on its way and I had a few veterans in my building one had recently had a lung removed, another had a partial lung removal but both depended on electricity to use breathing machines as needed. Naturally when the lights went out there was no generator, but who do you call? You call God and pray!
The storm doors dropped, I had a flashlight so that I could walk the long hallway that sheltered not just special needs but families with young children. In all there were over 100 people in the hallway. We could no longer utilize the classrooms because they had windows with no cover.
During that hurricane season I had volunteered for four hurricanes in the shelters and the aftermath shelters. I saw beauty in disaster and people come together with the American Spirit.
My experiences in Florida had inspired me to follow another path in my career. I was being trained now by American heroes Phoenix Fire Captains, and disaster workers from the Arizona Emergency Management Agency. Driving up to the gates at the National Guard was another experience that is amazing. Giving my ID and allowed access to this place felt like a true honor. I joined Phoenix CERT and the Maricopa Medical Reserve Corps as a Crisis Interventionist.
I was working for Value Options (the Behavioral Health Authority) as a Case Manager on a specialized team. It was hard to climb that ladder n social worker without a degree, but my experiences over 20 years proved to be of value.
The year was 2005 and Hurricane Katrina hit our Homeland with a vengeance. I was home when the phone rang early in the morning, it said Emergency Management on caller ID….I held my breath. The caller asked if I would accept an immediate deployment that would have a team fly into Georgia, get briefed then into the middle of the disaster. My heart sank when my boss at work refused to allow me to go. I was shocked. I did volunteer at the shelter here at the coliseum that was a true state of the art shelter. Our Governor Janet Napalitano was quick to do what was needed. I had another experience yet even bigger than the first, I received a certificate of recognition that was very nice, but the highest honor was the call to deploy to assist our citizens our American citizens. The American Spirit was alive and well within me that day.
I am continuing my studies in disaster under FEMA now. It will be a true honor to serve under HOMELAND SECURITY.
The American Spirit is truly GOD given.
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A_Silly_Lady_Novelist reviewed Version 2 -
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labyrinth reviewed Version 2 -
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I found it very interesting and easy to read despite the typo’s. If each event was expanded it would creeate a very inspirational memoir. your experiances are the kind many can benefit from and it would be an injustice not to share them.If you turn this into a book. Include as much emotion and rememberance as possible. It seems you would ave encountered many moving stories throughout your work ,and the should be shared.
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Emanon_Mercury reviewed Version 2 -
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Hello! First, I want you to know that I did enjoy your piece. It is very warm and refreshing to meet an individual who has such a passion and appreciation for this county (when I say meet, I mean the image that is given through your writing :P )
You have a lot of potential and this piece is good, however there are a few essential flaws which make this piece somewhat difficult to follow.
Your commas and punctuation arent bad, but it needs some tuning. You have commas where there doesn’t need to be and none where they need to be. But alot of people misuse commas (myself included) so this isn’t really a big deal. Some people just like people to have alot of pauses in there writing. “To each his own” right?
However, you have a tendency to jump from one subject to another without ever truly finishing the first thought. There is one paragraph that describes how you were given charge over people who needed electricity to live (they were running on generators I believe). Well you said the lights went out! So naturally, the generators kicked! Well what happened while you were in the dark? How did you get the elderly out? Did you manage yourself well under the pressure? Who else was there? Were you nervous, were you scared? I believe you did a great job in telling me this thought, and you really caught my attention when you said “but who do you call? You call God and pray!” But now I’m hungry for more information and you start heading into something different. It’s like in the next instant you start talking about the hallway which served special needs and others, and how you couldn’t use the rooms cause there were windows with no covers.
Your writing has a lot of potential! Veterans, heavy-military personnel and everyday American citizens would be awed and inspired by your work. I believe they would read your stuff and feel an overwhelming obligation to go out and do something to better serve this country; a calling from the “American Spirit”. But because your thoughts seem to be so sporatic at various spots, it can lose the reader or not give the reader enough to keep him/her interested.
Overall, I think it is great subject matter and good piece. But there needs to be more construction before we open up this building :P
My rating: 6/10, 9/10 with revisions.
Hope this helps! God bless.
tksutter reviewed Version 2 -
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This was a great insight into your experiences through life. I think it has potential – as well as you. I found very few, if any at all, typos which is most definitely rare in an unedited piece. Your experiences and views will inspire others as well as give them another view of the American people and patriotism. I know I was inspired by this piece.
The only bit of advice I can give is that if you do plan to write a book of your own experiences that you enhance and add to each happening you wrote about in this blog – believe me, people will be more than interested in your experiences through the 60’s and 70’s. I know I was. The changes that happened in those two decades effect us now.
It was an honor to read this – I thank you for sharing it.
kidwitprobs reviewed Version 1 -
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I thought that this piece was great and will do well in an autobiography. I could only find one thing wrong with this. The sentence “I was a deep thinker for a child but I was exposed to educated and interesting people from an early age.” you put in the word “but” this confuses me because “but” is usally put in a sentence to differ what was said originally. For instance “I ate the spinage, but I didn’t like it” maybe you could change the sentence to: “I was a deep thinker for a child because I was exposed to educated and interesting people from an early age.” or just use a word that properly exposes your particular voice, but I think that you get my point.
analise reviewed Version 1 -
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I first want to thank you for your contributions. :) Thank you for all you’ve done and all you’re going to do.
I second want to point out a couple of errors I noticed:
“was hard to climb that ladder n social worker without a degree,”
I think you meant to say “climb that ladder as a social worker…”. Or something to that effect.
“deploy to assist our citizens our American citizens.”
I think you just meant to say “our American citizens”. :)
Also, right about that paragraph, you seem to go from talking about volunteering for Katrina assistance but not being allowed to into the honor of doing something else but I’m not sure what. I think that paragraph could be clearer.
All in all though, it was a read I enjoyed so thank you for sharing it.
jadecat reviewed Version 1 -
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What an incredible memory you have! I truly enjoyed getting a peek into your past and what being an American meant to you. It was a well-written piecing, invoking just the right amount of feelings without being overly emotional. I felt a part of what you were experiencing, especially the thrill of flying over the Statue of Liberty. I could almost hear a narrator’s voice speaking throughout this. Keep that American Spirit alive!
shadowcat1620 reviewed Version 1 -
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In this day and age, with today’s youth being what it is, I think this piece speaks volumes. It’s because of people like you, and your family members that have made this country the greatest country to live in. I think that more kids today should read this, and if you continue on with your experiences, a book of your writings. As an average American making a difference for your country, IN your country, maybe they would take a cue from you and put more of their own resources into helping.
Grammatically speaking, I am no teacher (as you will see by the spelling and grammar of this review), but the one sentence I saw that might have an issue is: It was hard to climb that ladder n social worker without a degree, but my experiences over 20 years proved to be of value.
“ladder n social” = wasn’t sure if that was supposed to be “climb that ladder to social worker” or maybe something else.
Outstanding piece, thanks for writing it.
ally2kc reviewed Version 1 -
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Your story is one of great interest and certainly speaks volumes about the American Spirit. It is certainly worthy of a blog and you are right, I can imagine you have enough stories and experiences to put into an autobiography of sorts. However, you need some clear structural guidance of how to put your thoughts onto paper in a manner that others will identify with; someone more qualified than me I might add, but I have highlighted a few of the problems I found below.
“…I remember as a child attending a private school we all stood out under the flag…” This needs some punctuation or you could change it slightly to read “…I remember as a child attending private school standing out under the flag with my classmates…” You aren’t telling the reader about something you did “as you were standing under the flag” so the sentence feels a bit incomplete as it is.
The word Environment didn’t fit in the last sentence in the first paragraph. It made what should be a warm and relatively sentimental moment feel a bit clinical. Maybe trying something like “…everyone in my heart/life/family” would work better.
“My mother was very quick to sit me in front of the television when the President was speaking, or to see what was happening in Vietnam…”
This sounds like your mother was quick to see what was happening in Vietnam instead of you watched what was happening yourself. Perhaps you could say something like “…when the President was speaking, or when there was a bulletin reporting on the war”.
“…What was happening in Vietnam, and then there was NASA…”
The NASA bit is a separate thought and needs to be a separate sentence.
“…that the paintings and sculptures on the walls shook…”
Were the sculptures on the walls too?
There are quite a few names in paragraph four which can be a bit confusing. The focus shifts too quickly from one name to the other making it difficult for the reader to connect the story with reality.
The second sentence in paragraph 6 needs restructuring.
…”soldiers taking the huge chains under the water to keep the Brits from invading”
I don’t know what this is – maybe because I am Canadian and my history is terrible but you have to assume your reader knows nothing about the subject matter you are writing about
We flipped between wars (with the twin towers touched upon in between to abruptly for me to follow.
“The news was on and informing myself and my father in law…”
This sounds to formal and as if the news was just for the two of you. Maybe “…news was on and telling us…” would work.
“The volunteers that were needed happened to fall right into the lap of my skills.”
The volunteers didn’t fall in your lap I imagine. Maybe “my skill-set matched the volunteer needs perfectly…”
You switch between past and present tence –“…I WAS a desert rat who never SEES rain I WAS about to…”
There are quite a few periods missing and several commas. – keep an eye on punctuation as it makes your story harder to read and understand first time around.
Calypsoidal1 reviewed Version 1 -
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First, let me say that the tone and substance of your piece tells me that it definitely has a market. Not with this draft, certainly, but with polish and focus, there are magazines galore waiting to hear stories with a voice like yours.
So what to do? You wrote this may be the start of your autobiography – resist this for now. I recommend you pick out one small piece and turn it into a short story – true or “based on real events” – and there are lots of items to choose from: your relationship to Uncle John, the day of your Grandmother’s funeral at West Point, your first day as a Red Cross volunteer – any of these would make excellent stories on their own.
Your writing, though appropriate for a blog, is not the kind of writing that you need to sell a short story. There are great examples on this site and all around you that can help you cull a more literary piece from your life experiences.
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