Poetry / Voluptuous Trepidation

Your poetry really could use a specififc rhyme sceme. It seem like your just making a huge list. for example “This instant tastes like wormwood, scrapmetal, perspiration, latex gloves, stale cookies, boxed wine, aluminum foil, petroleum vapors. you could proboly get by on about half that many decriptive words. Your describing it so much that people probobly forget what they are reading about. Its cool how your writting make a design but its seem to have little or no meaning. poetry is supposed to be many words describing many situations not many words describing a situation. and even if its supposed to describe one then go back to the situation after a few describing words for example “This moment tasiste like wormwood and scrap metal, this instant reeks of latex gloves and boxed wine, this very secound, and so on. Well I hope my critisism was contructive enough for you. best of luck to you and your writtings.

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November 28, 2007

by the_girl_in_the_shadows

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its a list poem…. which is a specific strategy in poetry…  and i don’t do rhyming. Poetry can be many words describing a situation; who says it has to be about many situations? and who says this isn’t about many situations?

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