Stage Play / Sir Edwin and the Quest for Avalon Act II

Act II
Scene One

The next day, outside. Robin, Philippa, and Edwin are about to leave. They have a bag each and are in traveling clothes. Merlin is waiting with them.

Edwin: We are going on a quest! We are about the leave all the lands we have ever known to seek glory!

Robin: Because that worked out so well the first time that I did that.

Philippa: But surely you want to see the world and all the wonders that it contains, to adventure into the unknown kingdoms to seek the knowledge that comes out of going where you have no knowing?
        
Merlin: You are such unlike yourself today, Robin. What is wrong?

Robin: It is nothin’. Might be a little sick to my stomach, you know- from excitement.

Merlin: And what else are you going to tell us next, that one day men will fly with steel wings?

Edwin: Why would he say that?

Philippa: Look deeper than the surface, young knight. To understand you must first see.

Edwin: (backs away slightly from Merlin) So Robin, I think the sun is high enough in the sky. Shall we start our journey?

Robin: You’re in charge of this adventure, whatever you say goes, oh mighty Sir Edwin.

Edwin: Well, good day gentlemen!

Merlin: Wait just a minute; I have a feeling that you may have more companions coming than you thought.

Guinevere: (off stage, screaming) What do you mean that you are going with them? What about me? Did you even think for a moment what I am going to do all alone? You are leaving me at the mercy of Mordred? What about me?

Lancelot: (off stage, also screaming) What about you? Mayhap this country needs Arthur back more than you want him gone.

Guinevere: Then what about us? You expect me to wait here, alone to wait for you to come back with that awful man?  

Lancelot: Unlike someone I shall not mention, I feel more loyalty to my lord than to my desire. (Enters right running. Stops dignifiedly. Guinevere is close behind.) Sir Edwin, I have spent this past night thinking. I have changed my mind. May I accompany you on your quest?

Guinevere: Lancelot du Loc, you are not being serious!

Lancelot: Yes I am being serious, what of it Sir Edwin?

Edwin: I would be delighted to have you, don’t you agree Robin?

Robin: hmph

Edwin: Robin is not feeling well today. Now may we leave, Merlin?

Merlin: One more. (Bridgette, dressed up like a man with a helmet on, enters left) and he is right on cue.

Bridgette: (in a gruff voice) Greetings Sir Edwin, Sir Lancelot, Brother Robert. May I also have the opportunity to go with you?

Lancelot: Who… are you?

Bridgette: I am Bridge- uh- Sir Bridge of- uh- Paris, not been to court much you see.

Edwin: You are more then welcome to come with us Sir Bridge.  Now we will go, to the unexplored abyss and seek the shining light of peace! (Exits left)

Guinevere: (stomps foot) Lancie-lot, I am giving you one more chance to stay here.

Lancelot: Let’s go. (Quickly exits right, Philippa follows)

Merlin: May the wind be at your back. (Edwin enters left, confused and, exits right. Merlin exits left.)

Robin: (laughing) ‘Sir Bridge’, who exactly are you trying to fool?

Bridgette: Edwin (head high, exits right)

Robin: Bridgette, Bridgette, Bridgette. (Shakes head) Women, can’t live with ‘em-, well- (thinks) need ‘em to cook for ye. (Exits right)

Scene Two.

Outside. Bridgette and Lancelot are leading horses.

Bridgette: So, Sir Lancelot, I must know. What caused something as horrible as the battle at Camelot where the king was killed?

Lancelot: First, Sir Bridge, I would like to ask you a few questions.

Bridgette: (squeaks) Me? Questions?

Lancelot: One, for instance, Paris is in France.

Bridgette: Yes, there is a Paris  in France, but I am from the Paris in England; very small fief you see, not many have heard of it, quite close to the Welsh border actually.

Lancelot: Paris is next to Wales?

Bridgette: Yes, quite close. We trade mainly in imports; cloth and such.

Lancelot: Ah, I have not heard of your fief, but that is very understandable, there are many small places that I have not heard of. But why, may I ask have I not heard of you?

Bridgette: Well, I have been away from court for a long time. To tell you the truth; this was only my second stay at Camelot. You see, being quite close to Wales, we have to deal with the Welsh, which means that I am almost constantly called on to defend my people.

Lancelot: What kind of name is Bridge?

Bridgette: It is- Welsh; means ‘one who was born on structure that crosses water’

Lancelot: You were born on a bridge?

Bridgette: No, mummy just liked the name.

Lancelot: (suspicious) I see then; just one more question though-

Bridgette: Yes?

Lancelot: Why have you been lying to us?

Bridgette: (Nervously) Lying, why would you think that I am lying? (giggles)

Lancelot: I think you are lying because Robin told me you were lying. When I asked him what about he just laughed and laughed and told me to ask you.

Bridgette: Robin told you this? I can’t see how you could think that I was even telling the faintest part-truth. I can guarantee you; I’m honest to the core. (Still laughing, with an overly big smile, trying to act casual)

Lancelot: Sir Bridge, I can promise you that if you have pure and honest intentions for going on this quest I will see to it that you will continue with us, as long as you tell Sir Edwin.

Bridgette: No, no, please don’t make me tell Edwin!

Lancelot: (Raises one eyebrow) Robin was right.

Bridgette: I’ll tell you, just promise that you won’t make me tell Edwin until he thinks something is awry.

Lancelot: Good sir, I have known Edwin for but a day and already I know that if you were nine feet tall, green, and spoke only in mermish he would most likely never notice that anything was awry in the least.

Bridgette: Please, Lancelot, you are a wise man, so please listen to what I have to say. My offer is that I’ll tell you, I’ll go back if you want me to, but you don’t make me tell Edwin.

Lancelot: We have an accord. Now, what is this that you so desperately do not want Sir Edwin to hear?

Bridgette: My name is not really Sir Bridge, I’m not really knighted, and I’m not really from Paris-next-to-Wales, which I completely made up. The reason I’ve been lying is because (switches to normal voice) is because my name is really Bridgette de Merieanne, and I am from Glastonbury. Sir Edwin is my brother. (Getting quicker) I didn’t want to be left alone because I wanted adventure, and if I stayed at court then everyone would expect me to act like a normal lady and I couldn’t practice with my sword and I couldn’t ride by myself and knights might try to get me to fall in love with them and I was afraid I would and then I thought that maybe I already have and I don’t want to get married and trapped for the rest of my life and and and…

Lancelot: Slow down, just breathe.

Bridgette: (takes big breath, lets it out) Thank you. Can you find it in your heart to let me stay with you on this quest?

Lancelot: I think that I like your spirit Lady, even if you are but a woman and will impede our progress. You may stay.

Bridgette: (Jumps up and down, hugs Lancelot) Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

Lancelot: (Perplexed) You are welcome, I think.

Bridgette: (Happily) I am off to kill Robin, any suggestions? (Philippa enters)

Lancelot: Some hemlock will do very well in his tea.

Philippa: Who are you killing?

Bridgette: Nothing, it was merely sarcasm. Thank you again Sir Lancelot, I owe you one. (Exits right, leaving horse with Lancelot, then enters right) Wait a minute, I never asked you anything.

Lancelot: If you must, then ask away, milady.

Bridgette: First what happened?

Lancelot: What do you mean?

Bridgette: How did he die?

Lancelot: (sighs) I assume you mean Arthur? (Bridgette nods) How to begin, how to begin?

Philippa: Is it not best to begin at the beginning?

Lancelot: I suppose so.

Philippa: Oh, I love a good story.

Lancelot: After Tristan, Bors, Galahad, and Percival’s grail quest was over Arthur knew that the golden age of Camelot was about to come to an end. Knights had been killed and there were none to replace them; prophesies were coming true left and right.

Bridgette: Didn’t you go on the grail quest also?

Lancelot: Yes I did; the keepers of the grail would permit only those with a pure heart and souls see the grail and drink from it. I was judged to be unworthy.

Bridgette: You were Arthur’s best knight you have healed two mortally wounded men with your bare hands! How could you be found wanting?

Lancelot: Simple, I as a man have achieved much in my time, but my soul is not clear. I had loved my lord’s wife, but I was not true to her, nor would I ever be. I had sinned. And I was never Arthur’s best knight, valiant Percival is beyond compare, and Galahad was the most holy of us all, may his soul rest in peace. Now interestingly Guinevere brings us to the next point in our story. (Robin sneaks in unnoticed right) After our return from the quest I stayed away from Camelot because I was too ashamed to gaze upon my lady love-

Philippa: Didn’t you just say-

Lancelot: Hush; but when I came back Guinevere found me alone one midsummer’s night in the courtyard. I told her what happened and somehow she got me so twisted that at the beginning I was just mad at myself and at the end of our conversation all I could think of was her. Let’s just say that we thought we were alone, so we let our guard down. Then that snake of a human being, Mordred, found us. We didn’t know it at the time, so we gave him plenty of evidence of infidelity. He told Arthur and the next night Mordred and a band of armed knights were sent to catch me alone with Gwen in her rooms. I was there, and unarmed. By the grace of God I was able to escape and somehow bring all that came to capture me but Mordred down. I escaped (sits) but Gwen was convicted of high treason. (Bridgette sits) She was to be burned at the stake at dawn. I couldn’t let that happen could I? After all, I was as much to blame as she was. (Bridgette nods head) I rescued her. Already half of Arthur’s knights were on my side. Guinevere, Mordred and I had started a civil war. I ran to France and Arthur followed me. By that time Mordred had declared that Arthur had died in France at my hand, and he declared himself king.

Bridgette: But he couldn’t-

Lancelot: If you both keep talking I’m not going to finish. (Bridgette is silent) When Arthur returned to Britain Mordred had gathered a force against him. Arthur was weak and Mordred was newly strong, they fought and in the last battle Arthur was slain by Mordred. That is the tale of how Arthur died and Mordred became king.

Robin: That’s a very nice story, any of it true? (Lancelot throws something at him) Okay, okay, I get the hint! (Exits right)

Bridgette: He is a very evil man isn’t he? Maybe killing him was a good idea.

Philippa: So you were trying to kill Robin?

Lancelot: (To Bridgette) Is that everything that you wanted to know, milady?

Bridgette: What about Avalon?

Lancelot: I have no proof for it nor do I have proof against it. So I put my faith in Merlin; he has been right enough times about such that I can’t help but go on his word. Besides, I caused Arty’s downfall. My guilt will not let me keep on living if there is something I could do to bring him back and I didn’t do it.

Bridgette: You called him Arty.

Lancelot: King Arthur of Camelot was my lord and king; Arty was my single truest friend.

Bridgette: I have just one more question? (Robin sneaks in unnoticed right again)

Lancelot: I promised, go ahead.

Bridgette: What did you ever see in Guinevere to begin with?

Lancelot: When she was young her hair was as red as wine and skin paler then fresh winter snow. She was as patient as an oak. She was in my mind, the perfect woman.

Philippa: I figured it as such.

Lancelot: She was young then, but you must remember so was I, and since then I have learned that wine red hair and snow white skin are not signs of character. Now I know it is by character that you must pick the one that you vow to love until your dying day, and that Guinevere does not have the character that I should have picked.  Gawain, on the other hand, married the ugliest woman I have ever seen, but he is the happiest man alive when it comes to matters of the heart.

Bridgette: You are a truly wise man, Sir Lancelot, but for your past actions.

Lancelot: Age does that to a man, you just wait until Edwin and Robin are my age. Then they might start to make sense.

Robin: I should think not. Me, make sense? Why, such an atrocity shall never occur if I have anything to say about it.

Lancelot: Have you always been a very slow learner?

Robin: What do you mean? (Lancelot catches Philippa and Bridgette’s eyes. They nod and smile at each other, then subtly pick up something and throw it at him. Robin holds up arms and tries to dodge) Ah! Ow! Violence against a monk is a sin! (Runs off stage right)

Lancelot: (to Robin) You are as much a monk as I am! (Both laugh) You know, milady Chaucer, I have a good story I heard that might fit in with your pilgrim’s tales.

Philippa: Oh really? What shall I call it? I already have “The Knight’s Tale” I can’t have “The Other Knight’s Tale”.

Lancelot: I’ve always fancied myself as a clerk, maybe of Oxford or Cambridge.

Philippa: “The Clerks Tale” it is then. (Exits with Lancelot. Bridgette sits and stares off, thinking. Robin sneaks in again and sits by her without her noticing, he touches her shoulder and she screams, then she realizes who it is)

Bridgette: Oh, it’s just you.

Robin: Milady, it’s just me, just poor old illegitimate commoner Robin here.

Bridgette: (Tenderly) You know, I don’t think your quite so poor and pitiful as you make your self out to be.

Robin: Oh really?

Bridgette: Yes, (Reaches up and puts hand on his face) I think that you just want to make me feel sorry for you. (Puts hand down)

Robin: And why would I want you to do that?

Bridgette: So that you make me feel sorry for you, and then make me feel bad about myself for feeling sorry for you and then make me all confused so that I am more vulnerable.

Robin: It seems that you had caught on to what I am doing, even if I did not know that I was doing it (Laughs, slowly runs his fingers through her hair)

Bridgette: Listen, about last night-

Robin: Yes…?

Bridgette: We said a lot of things to each other that shouldn’t have been said and I-

Robin: Is this an apology from a noblewoman to a little peasant like me?

Bridgette: (sighs) and I was up too far on my pedestal.

Robin: Ah, so it is that you are lowering yourself to my level. What has caused you to require my assistance so badly that you had to commit the flagrancy of not holding the pride of the goddess of all of Glastonbury?

Bridgette: (stands up, starts to get upset) Robin, I just wanted to apologize. I have no ulterior motive; all I want is the likewise, and forgiveness.

Robin: What did you say?

Bridgette: I want nothing but to apologize and be forgiven, and I only ask that you seek the same.

Robin: No, what was the first thing you said just then?

Bridgette: Robin?

Robin: I thought so, milady.

Bridgette: Does that mean that you forgive me?

Robin: Not necessarily, oh exulted one.

Bridgette: Then what is it that you want me to do?

Robin: Milady, all I wish is that you never speak to me like that again and for you to realize that we are all human beings, we all come into this world with nothing and we don’t take anything with us. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, milady. No man is created better than ‘is neighbor.

Bridgette: You are a son of nobility, and you are a good man, you have a noble mind and blood; but that- that goes against everything I’ve ever been told. It goes against the church and the monarchy. It may not be wrong, but if it is true, then the rest of the world sure is.

Robin: What does any of this matter to you, your worship?

Bridgette: I love you, Robin, god damn you to bloody hell for it, I love you.

Robin: I know, milady.

Bridgette: ‘You know’? Is that all you have to say to me?

Robin: At this moment-, yes, it is.

Bridgette: I hate you! (Storms off stage right)

Robin: I know. (Lights fade out)

Scene Three

On a road near Dover. Lancelot, Bridgette, Philippa and Edwin are on stage.

Lancelot: So Edwin, do you tire of your quest yet?  

Edwin: No, I’m just getting started. (Yawns) However, I do tire of being tired.

Lancelot: We have traveled a long distance since we have left Camelot, haven’t we? I’m starting to like this traveling life.  Maybe I’ll be a wandering bard. It seems kind of romantic, don’t you think? Always being wayworn and having no way to feed yourself except though the tales that you tell.

Philippa: I thought the ale you told me was rather good. I could see you as a bard.

Bridgette: Now that you mention it, we have traveled a long way. As soon as we get on that ship, if Robin can ever barter passage, then we won’t even be in Britain any more.

Edwin: You know, I’ve never been off this isle before.

Bridgette: You know what? This trip is my first out of Glaston- Paris. So where are we landing?

Lancelot: We’ll go from Dover, which is this port to, I think its Calais, which is the channel crossing on the French side. (Robin enters left, Bridgette makes point of not being close to him or making eye contact)

Robin: We got on a ship!

Edwin: Which ship? Did you get on the really big one that said they could get us across the big water in less than a day?

Robin: Actually no, but not for lack of trying.

Lancelot: Well spit it out, which was it?

Robin: It was the little yellow one in the corner, called the Aquamarine, the only one we could afford. Crew looked a little funny, but I guess it was safe- enough. Figured we are supposed to be going on a quest and this might liven up our sense of adventure.

Bridgette: The Aquamarine? Are you serious?

Robin: Unfortunately; the captain said that he would be sending a few people up to get our stuff. We’ll be leaving a little sooner than you wanted to.

Philippa: Meaning?

Robin: What time is it?

Edwin: (Looks up at sky) I’d have to guess about 3:29 p.m. this side of Greenwich.

Robin:  About twenty nine minutes ago. (Enter Sailor 1)

Sailor 1: (Salutes, stands straight at attention) Greetings milords, I am Sailor 1. (Sailor A enters, stands at attention next to Sailor 1)

Sailor A: (Salutes) I am Sailor A. We are here to

Sailor 1: pick up your effects. Captain

Sailor A: Wants to leave as soon

Sailor 1: As possible. Now if you would be

Sailor A: So kind as to give us

Sailor 1: your luggage so that we

Sailor A: can take it to the ship?

Bridgette: Of course. (Everyone hands over stuff, gives a couple coins) Take this sailor… ummm…

Sailor 1: One, he’s A, and

Sailor A: Thank you milord. I think that it is

Sailor 1: Time for our marketing bit? I quite agree.

Sailor A: Ready? (Two extra people enter two extra people with instruments)

Sailor 1: Ready.

Sailor A: One… Two… Three…

All sailors: (look at each all then starts to sing VERY loudly)
In the town, where I was born
Lived a man, who sailed to sea,
And he told us of his life, in the land of the marine,
So we went on to the ship, till we found,
What we were looking for,
And we lived above the waves on the Aquamarine
We all live in the Aquamarine, the Aquamarine, the Aquamarine
We all live in the Aquamarine, Aquamarine, the Aquamarine, (continue to sing as all exit left)

Lancelot: You were right about the crew.

Bridgette: uh-huh.

Robin: (Looks to sky, hands in air) Lord, please let me survive this crossing! (exits left)

Lancelot: Who knows, the ship might be okay, even if the sailors are little… insane. I call top bunk! (Runs off left)

Edwin: Not if I get there first! (Follows)

Philippa: I actually rather liked the song (Lights fade)

Scene Four

In Calais, France, outside, on a road. Lancelot, Bridgette, Edwin, Philippa, and Robin enter left wearily carrying bags and guiding horses.

Lancelot: I don’t care if I have to sell the shirt off my back to pay for it; I am not going on the ship again.

Bridgette: Ugh, I can’t get that stupid song out of my head (hums)

Robin: Why does a ship need a marketing song anyway?

Lancelot: Because that is all the ruddy thing has going for it. (All except for Robin and Bridgette exit right)

Robin: How come me they always run off and leave me alone with you?

Bridgette: Lord only knows (starts towards exit)

Robin: Wait-, (Robin rushes behind her and grabs her arm and turns her toward him.) Do you still feel the same way about your dear old Robin Hood?

Bridgette:  Now you don’t hate me for what I said back at Camelot?

Robin: I just couldn’t accept that what you were saying was true, even if I didn’t like the facts of life. The way society has taught us to live is just a little different than how I choose to be. What I thought was that you, being so different in other ways would be quicker to accept things the way I saw them. I hate society and the feudal system, never you. I got so attached to you so quickly. I fell in love. I never thought that a cold man like me could ever feel like this towards anyone else, but it has happened. I love you, come what may, I will always love you.

Bridgette: (smiles) I know (exits right)

Robin: Why you slimy rogue! (enter Sailor 1, A, and their extras)

Band: Yesterday all your troubles seemed so far away
Now it looks like she’s here to stay
Oh, we believe, in yesterday.
Suddenly you’re not half the man you used to be-

Robin: What are you doing here?!

Band: She loves you ya ya ya
She loves you ya ya ya
And with a love like that you know you should be glad

Robin: But Bridgette says that she wants to love me but she feels like she can’t because I am not a stupid noble. It would take so much money to buy a title, I know I will never be able to afford it, and she can’t marry me because of her family. Even when I poured my heart out to her she didn’t say anything about the future, or even us. I need a title and money before she would even consider marrying me.

Band: All you need is love
All you need is love
All you need is love, love,
Love is all you need.

Robin: Why am I even talking to you anyway? This is none of your business. Get out! (They don’t, he holds up his like he is going to punch them.)

Band: Help! We need somebody
Help! Not just anybody,
Oh we need someone to help! (exit, Bridgette, Lancelot, Tristan, Edwin enter)

Lancelot: Oh, I thought we left you here.

Edwin: So where do we go now? Normandy?

Lancelot: It’s best if we follow the Pilgrim’s Highway to Rouen and take the exit before it turns toward Spain then we will go on the route towards Normandy. On another subject, I think that since it is very much impossible that any of us turn back now that it is time for our Sir Bridge to confess.

Bridgette: You promised!

Lancelot: You are coming with us, guaranteed.

Edwin: What?

Robin: Oh come on, you honestly believed that there was a person named Sir Bridge among us?

Edwin: I honestly have noticed nothing out of the ordinary.

Bridgette: Fine, fine, let’s just get this over with (takes off helmet, revealing hair, switches to normal voice) Edwin, I’m sorry, I wanted to come, and if I would have asked you, you would have said absolutely no.

Edwin: Bridgette! What are you doing here?

Philippa: Have you not been listening?

Bridgette: (to Edwin) Why not?

Edwin: You’re weak! You’re female!

Philippa: What am I, a fish?

Bridgette: Who saved us from the visible thieves at the inn? Not brave Sir Edwin.

Edwin: Oh, oh. (Angry) You are going into the convent when we get to Rouen! And you will stay there. I am your lord and you protector and you will do what I say!

Robin: Sir Edwin, may I have your sister’s hand in marriage?

Edwin: Yes, but that doesn’t change anything, Bridgette, you are staying at the convent and I – what did you say?

Robin: I asked you if I could marry Bridgette, and you said yes, so that makes her my responsibility, which means she is not staying at a convent!

Edwin: Oh yes she is!

Robin: But I am her lord.

Edwin: You are not married yet.

Bridgette: Do I even get a say in this?

Robin and Edwin: NO!

Robin: Why don’t we get married in Rouen and then that would solve the problem?

Edwin: Then she could come with us, which is not happening.

Robin: She is coming with us; I am not leaving my betrothed in some French convent while I go and quest for something that doesn’t even exist.  

Edwin: Fine then, I retract my permission; you can’t marry her.

Robin: But you are a nobleman and you are going against your word by retracting your permission.

Edwin: You’re right; she’ll be your betrothed, but you are not marrying in Rouen.

Robin: She can come along too.

Edwin: No she can’t, she’s too weak.

Robin: She’s kept up with us so far, what is going to change?

Edwin: Fine! She can come.  

Robin: Fine! (To Bridgette, smiling) There sweets, you can come with us now.

Bridgette: Who says I want to marry you?  

Robin: You did.

Bridgette: I did not!

Robin: You implied it.

Bridgette: Implying something is much different that actually saying it.

Robin: So you are admitting that you did imply it.

Bridgette: No, I am admitting that you think I implied it.

Lancelot: Can we just stop it with the bickering please? Lady Bridgette, it is wrong for women to argue with their loves in public. I don’t want to hear it from you again.

Bridgette: But I… he-

Lancelot: No more of this. We best get going along.

Bridgette: But- he started it!

Lancelot: Tisk, tisk, Lady Bridgette, how dishonorable of you. (Rides off left; everyone follows, Bridgette staying well away from Robin)

End Act II

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