Poetry / A Daily Testimony of a World’s Decline

My daily drive; today through pouring rain,
Behind road fog snaking towards me from the truck ahead,
Slowly approaching the cloud-shrouded glass and metal,
Framed by downtowns bustling highways.

Graffiti on walls and overpasses define the city climate
Testimony of a divided space and time
Obscenities litter the viaducts and road signs
Racial slurs and sexual innuendos graphically apparent.

Beggars crowd each corner light.
Wheel chaired homeless; missing limbs and teeth,
Huddled beneath layers of sweaters and tattered jackets,
Mumbling into their private cyberspace of unreality.

Parking lots crowded with brown skinned men,
Waiting for one day’s employment to wander by,
Speaking a language that is becoming the norm,
Twelve deep clustered in one room flats.

Sirens wail as the babies cry,
Crack head infants abandoned to a depleted system,
Children birthing children into a burdened structure,
Seams bursting in the waistcoat of mankind.

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Reviews

February 01, 2008

Tragicangel003

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
74	77.8% (45 votes)	100.0%

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Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
21	F	Lancaster, CA	November 26

Tragicangel003 reviewed Version 2 - Read 100% of the Item

This is all true and depressing of our time. However I’d like to see some more flow in the poem. It seems kind of thrown together. A little more thought and this would be a very thought-provoking poem.

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No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
337	86.5% (89 votes)	29.4%

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
55	F	Desoto, TX	November 08

February 01, 2008

JustGeneric

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
230	94.0% (100 votes)	6.2%

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Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
100	F	United States	September 03

JustGeneric reviewed Version 2 - Read 100% of the Item

Great poem! This sounds just like my hometown, but then, I suppose it sounds like many peoples hometowns. I especially liked this verse:
“Parking lots crowded with brown skinned men,
Waiting for one day’s employment to wander by,
Speaking a language that is becoming the norm,
Twelve deep clustered in one room flats.”
It reminds me of what I pass every morning on my way to work. I also liked the last line, because it was an excellent metaphor for mankind’s condition today. I liked the way it flowed and it was easy to read and understand. Thanks for sharing!