Flash Fiction / The New Vintage
Dad grew his hair back out once Mom left. The tangled mess of gray rested on the shoulders of his coffee-stained maroon tuxedo.
Ass in the air, he rummaged through the closet to find his ostrich boots from high school.
I sat on his king-sized bed and watched him, a man now.
“You’re a teenager again. Remember that,” I told him as he found his boots from behind the vacuum cleaner. He sat down on Mom’s vintage chest and put them on.
He stood and circled around, extending his arms out like he was auctioning a pair of wooden wings, showcasing the elegant craftwork.
“Do I look too 70’s?” he asked.
“We’re living in the 70’s again. I told you, you’re a teenager now,” I tried to convince him. “You look great.”
He stood in the yellow bathroom, covered in a thin sheet of nicotine, smoking a cigarette.
“I don’t know if I can go through with this,” he confessed into the bathroom mirror.
“Yes you can. You’re just going out and meeting people. You can talk to people, can’t you?” I asked him.
“Yeah, I can,” he said, and sighed.
Dad examined his face, looking at the crow’s feet at the corner of his eyes, and the spider veins that plagued his cheeks and chin. I could tell he was thinking of what Mom was doing tonight.
He drank diet coke and smoked the end of his cigarette.
“All right, I think I’d better head out,” he said, grabbing the keys from on top his old Bible.
“Don’t worry about the house,” I told him, patting his back. “I’ve got it covered.”
After he had left, the old family dog and I watched television. He was bundled under quilts in his chair as I flipped through channels. Everything was quiet, and I wondered how late Dad would stay out.
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This 109 word review has not been unlocked.
Interesting story, seems that a father is trying to get back out for a date after his wife, well at least the mother of his child, had left the both of them. She did not sound dead at least…but that could all just be my opinion. It was a flash of fiction as it should have been.
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What a cute story. You’ve done such a great job at describing everything from the yellow bathroom to the Dad’s ugly suit. I really could picture it well. I’d make one change: -grabbing the keys from on top his old Bible- I’d use the word atop rather than on top. That said, you’ve done a great job creating these characters in such a short piece.
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You portrayed Dad’s nervousness well in this piece…and the reassuring child. I like how it ends with the child waiting up for the parent. You wrote this event very well…showing a generation gap closing in…meeting in the middle. Would love to read more of your flash fiction!
“diet coke”...capitalize proper nouns
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