pariah's profile

pariah avatar
AGE: 19
LOC: Kings Mountain, NC
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: November 01

my name is kyle griffin
i write almost constantly
i write to vent out my feelings in a self-theraputic way.

I’m also part of an improv/sketch comedy troupe

www.youtube.com/toneygriffincorp

www.myspace.com/toneygriffincorp

Item Stats
Reviewer Stats
Items
Version 1
5 Reviews   0 Comments
Part 1, 1 AN EYE FOR AN EYE, A TOOTH FOR THE MOUTH Distant and distraught, the voices in his head echoed like a chamber ensemble. He reached up and clasped his head between his hands, trying to focus. But he couldn’t. Thoughts drifted in and out of his head randomly like plankton in the ocean. He realized he was lying face down on the ground. What happened? He thought, this has to be a dream. He lifted his head up; a thin strand of drool stretched from the edge of his mouth to the small pudd...
Ratings & Rankings
Stage Play / Shadows
Version 1
7 Reviews   1 Comment
Characters: THOMAS-wearing a gray overcoat and what ever else the director chooses CHARLES-warm clothing DAD-dress clothing HEIDI -warm clothing SAM-warm clothing SHADOWS A, B, C, D, E (completely black clothing, black masks, shadows E wears a gray overcoat like THOMAS. A, B, and E are definitely male. C and D are definitely female. Try to male their costuming and movements exact to the character they are shadowing.) Opens with THOMAS pacing around his office. Two of the shadows are in the cu...
Ratings & Rankings
Stage Play / Buying A Life
Version 1
11 Reviews   4 Comments
CAST: Michael Stephanie Joseph Woman Behind Counter (WBC) Enseamble of about four or five SR is set up like a living room area with a front door far SR, there is a television set off center toward SL. C is a bedroom where there is a bed. Lights are on in the living area as well as the TV, all lights are off SL. Michael: (Coming on SR) Hey honey I’m home. (He speaks very dully) I’m thinking we should have casserole tonight, what do you think? (Walks to the TV (off C) it is turned on) You left ...
Ratings & Rankings
Short Story / Lullaby
Version 1
6 Reviews   5 Comments
Maybe it was just my imagination that the body lying in front of me moved, or maybe it was the light in this cold place, or maybe it was my nerves getting to me, but it sure did look as if it moved. I reached my hand up and scratched my head, dried blood between my fingers flaking off into my hair. I was thinking. We were thinking. Thinking about the best time to act, thinking about the consequences that could result in what I'm doing and am going to do. And he was thinking it too. He was thi...
Ratings & Rankings
Short Story / Taxi Drivers
Version 1
10 Reviews   2 Comments
I looked ahead into the street watching the people scurrying around like ants, trying to not be late to their menial jobs. This makes me angry. Self-centered, disrespecting, unforgiving, “I-only-have-time-for-myself” people. They find time to watch Oprah though. I pick out my subjects carefully, watching their movements, listening to their cell phone conversations, learning their daily routine. I learn everything about everyone. I’m just a passive observer. I stand here at the corner every d...
Ratings & Rankings
Reviews
Poetry / Buried Letter
You know honestly this didnt really grab me as i would have thought. When writing something with as little words as possible and making a poem to be as blunt as possible which is something that i think you were trying to do here you have to understand what can be said through silence or what in the words that you arent saying can be said through the words you are actually saying. Does that make sense? Anyways, you really have to work on getting across to the reader what the underlying message...
Poetry / Compulsion
I like the separation of the first line with the rest of the piece. It gives it more depth and menaing i think. Overall I think this was pretty well written. Maybe if you were to have written it and then let it "rest" for a couple days and then reread the piece to go over any mistakes and add new, refreshed insight to the poem it may end up being better try to avoid becoming too cliche. You never really reach the point of making a cliche but you do come close, an example would be the over pro...
Incredible use of syntax here. the imagery is pretty great as well. I love the repetistion of sounds you use as well "glacier grinding." thing like that Overall I dont have much to say other than i liked this very much
I used to read sci-fi/ fantasy all of the time then i got into poetry and stephen king this makes me want to reenter the realm =] one thing i dont like which you really cant change is calling something a "Quest" even though that is essentially what it is it just bugs me for some reason. im speaking of in the character's dialoque like when they were talking about the accidents during training etc . . . that may just be a pet peeve of mine so disregard that if you want. the whole world staying ...
Short Story / In Loving Memory
I can relate to this piece. My father past away when i was 12 and i still havent gotten over it i know how difficult writing about such a tender subject as this can be but you put this on here for a critique first off avoid cliches cliches are to be blunt cliche and they make a piece sound immature and elementary one line that strcuk me was "before i see your name in stone" i like it i dont know why. in the paragrah about you wishing he would awaken in the casket "i fooled you didnt i?" i thi...