pattyhinojos's profile
AGE:
34
LOC: Augusta, GA
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: June 13
LOC: Augusta, GA
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: June 13
Hello Everyone.
My name is Patty. I currently live in Eddyville, IL. My man is gone right now, over in the Middle East fighting this lovely war! So, here I sit with our 3 children. I’ve been writing since high school (typical teenage angst, “can’t wait to get out of this house and on my own” stuff), but I discovered in ‘98 that I really had stuff to say that I wanted to put out there. So…here it is…almost 10 years later and I’m finally doing something about it. I’ve done a lot of growing up in that time, and am finally ready to expose my work to people other than my family. They are fine in handing out praise, but I need to hear criticism from people who don’t know me well enough to just stroke my ego. That’s why I’m here….
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Winter an audible silence a quiet you could hear if you could listen close enough whispers of snow drifting slowly to the ground listen closely the sound you can almost hear the sound of creation sleeping.
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Topping the crest of the hill, I saw it. Stretched out in front of me. The ocean lay on the not-to-distant horizon, opening up before me like a beautiful, blue invitation. I hurry to the coast, my foot on the accelerator, pressing it closer and closer to the floor. My speed increases as my anticipation builds...
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Purple cows, Pink cockroaches, and Dots of light on my ceiling, Moving shadows, Dancing flowers, and Psychadelic, tie-dyed pillowcases Scream lurid tales In silent voices which Thunder inside my ears. All the while The pearl white moon Mocks me Sleep... Sleep... Sleep.
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Now only 4 weeks from the delivery of my third child, I sit up, sleepless in a La Quinta in Odessa, TX. It’s 1:30 am. My children sleep soundly at my mother-in-law’s house. At least, I hope they are sleeping. My husband is out playing pool with his older brother. And here I sit. Drinking decaf coffee and trying to read “Strawberrying” by May Swenson, the little life inside me decides to stretch out and make himself more comfortable. I must cramp his style because he insists on reminding me o...
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Mona Lisa’s mysterious little smirk of a smile… What did she know to maker her smile so? A secret. A secret secret. One that she knows will be hers forever. Perhaps. Or… Was it hope? A peaceful hope Seated deeply in her soul. The smile of a woman Who perhaps Seeming to have nothing To be happy about Has found something Something to smile about That she keeps hidden Untouched Unperverted Deep inside the only place within That remembers how to smile.
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This grown up version of the childhood classic is very nice. It's good to see that the nice guy doesn't always finish last. Your description of Charlie Brown throughout the story were spot-on. It seemed like the same old Chuck we grew up with only with grown-up baggage. Also, I spent some time in Monterey while I was in the Navy and I liked the use of the area as a back drop. I have been to many of the places to which Charlie went and was able to follow right along with where you were taking ...
Hi Rabbit, There's no date on when you submitted this piece but I bet I know when you wrote it. You did a good job putting into words what we were going through at the time without going too deeply into specifics. One thing I would do though is add a little more detail to really bring out how torn you were between the reality of what's happening to you and the "fantasy" of the life you thought we were going to have. Also, the 2nd line of the 4th stanza "Is it us that..." is a little weak. How...
Any time I read something from the "Children's" section, I read it aloud to my older kids. This time I read it to my daughter (who is 11). We have these questions. We would like to know... What kind of creature is Ock? Do the elder's (Suki's) shoes get passed down from one elder to the next? Also, is Ultr another fairy or what? You mentioned in your notes that you knew there were some errors, so I will not bring them up, but I do want to draw your attention to a couple that could be easy to o...
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