rossipossi's profile
AGE:
19
LOC: Conway, AR
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: July 07
LOC: Conway, AR
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: July 07
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Thinking is impossible. At least for myself. They tell me “Don’t do that, but do this.” My brain is in overdrive. It’s hooked up to an engine. A 351 Cleveland that goes the speed of light. If my engine goes any faster my thoughts will explode. Explode like gunpowder ready for a light show. I wish I would explode. “Beep, beep. Beep, beep. Beep, beep.” It’s time. Time to swallow. To swallow the misery that keeps me alive. My days are nothin...
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A teacher is here for two reasons: one, to teach; two, to learn. As a future teacher I believe that our purpose in life is not only to leave an imprint on someone’s life, but also to leave this world having learned something from our students. A teacher should not be uptight. Self-righteous. Closed minded. Cynical. And definitely not impersonal. A teacher should be a learner. My inspiration of a “learning teacher” comes from one of my high school teachers. He left me with a quote, “Pursue you...
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As I walk home from a long day’s work I find myself alone in an alley. Being that I am new to New York City I get lost all the time, but finding myself in a dark and grimy alley at 1:45 A.M. is just a little unnerving. As I become uneasy I tell myself: Lily just get over yourself, no one is here and you’re just going to end up freaking yourself out. When I begin walking again I hear the soft splash of water under my steps. The ground is wet from the rain earlier this morning. When I get to t...
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I think that your poem is a fairly close representation of how the survivors feel. My favorite line of the poem is "home is where the heart sank" I love the pun, but it also hits home. It is a unique way of describing the things that took place. I think it could probably use a few smoothing overs just to make it easier to read. Keep up the work.
I applaud you. Much of your writing style is my style so I have already developed a sort of love for you. Anyways I love how sadistic human nature is and how you captured it, and how blunt you were with the bloodshed. My suggestion is to correct some of the grammar: "our passion is now different" change to "different now"- I understand that the reverse of the two words gives it a unique ring that would most times work but this time it make the reader stumble. Try finding a better more vivid w...
I like the overall premise of the poem, and I think that you are on a good start and that the poem could diffidently be expanded and grow into something amazing. I suggest that you take some of the common words that are use in language and trying finding more poetic synonyms.
Will I be missed? That's what I find in this poem. "In my Twenty-One years of breathing have I done anything worthy in my life?" What you done in life to be appreciated? Do deserve respect or is it just a waste to keep on living? What will you miss when you go- anything? I liked it, but I suggest adding more imagery so that your readers will connect better.
I think that overall it is a well began poem. Obviously it needs some tweaking but it flows well. I would suggest taking the last line starting with "But..." and editing it to where it is saying the same thing but in short excerpts. All of your other lines are short and straight on but this one just keeps on going and going and going. It cause the poem to lose its voice and rhythm. Keep up the good work.
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