septemberchild's profile
AGE:
41
LOC: Dillsburg, PA
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: February 02
LOC: Dillsburg, PA
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: February 02
I am an avid thinker, unpolished writer, and distracted reader. I like to make up stories for my kids and write the occasional poem. I love nature, esppecially during the fall. My birthday is in September, which for me is the start of my reflection season.
Items
Version 2
8 Reviews
3 Comments
Her Race Courage is starting the last 50 meters in a 200 meter race -- when all the other swimmers have finished, when the splashing drowns out the sole voice of unconditional love yelling, “Go baby go,” when the pool seems lonely and the water thick. It is trying to win what she knows is ...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
9 Reviews
7 Comments
Courage is starting the last 50 meters in a 200 meter race when all the other swimmers have finished and trying to focus on the finish while the splashing drowns out the sole voice of unconditional love yelling, “Go baby go,” trying to win what she knows as her race.
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
24 Reviews
30 Comments
A corpse of a house Hides in a naked copse - Defunct and fallen. Desolate meadow turns grey winter skies sallow. Someone dream'd here once. Lost harvest winds stir Low clouds and chattering fields - Combing out the past. Released seeds follow Ghostly trails through tall grasses. Small feet wander in. Her flaxen hair weaves Into dry, whispering straw and closes over.
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
39 Reviews
29 Comments
slow talking under love soft snow down street light blues on quiet avenues
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
16 Reviews
19 Comments
Snuggle buggies are my favorite kind of bug Especially under my blankets when I'm warm and snug. Only 3 legs, no head and no wings These snuggle buggies can do amazing things. They only come out for a minute or two Just long enough to say “I Love You.” Sometimes they crawl and sometimes they fly They like to come out at “Goodnight” and “Goodbye.” They're stronger than ants and sweeter than bees Snuggle buggies are the right bug for me. My snuggle buggie is the friendliest bug. She never bites...
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Smooth, clear ... like the line "the perfection of / a loving soul encased / in the only body it knows / however awkward" ... i understand this as the soul only knows one body, but it will choose perfection of itself regardless and this being of divine intention. I have a little trouble with the title and the last line but on the whole I love the poem. Thanks for sharing.
The title is significant to the perspective of the poem, without it I probably would not have come to appreciate this experience. As such, I read this through the eyes of someone who has cancer and as such sees the world of dying through her/his own sadness reflecting on the fallen tree as she/he would her/his own cancer. I am not sure what "weight" is in this picture but i can appreciate it's sentimental meaning. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for sharing your experience. I felt the poem was clear and portrayed sentiment that anyone who has lost someone can appreciate. I actually think the poem could have stopped before this line, "I know you’re up above and watching " - at this line the poem changed, to me, it became detached from the sentiment that you were developing earlier. And this line "Ants scurrying about" seemed rather abrupt in terms of perspective, I mean, you spend most of the poem showing a person crying and a ...
Good statement. I think this statement needs more symetry ... "marry someone you" seems off balance with "marry the person who", maybe change "someone" to "a person" and change "the person" to "a person" and remove the word "who." Just my 2 cents.
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