Sporky's profile

“I’m not wearing underwear today.” It’s a simple enough expression, albeit a bit off-color. Shock value aside, there’s little more to the song than meets the eye: the singer is, in fact, not wearing underwear on this particular day. The humor seems contrived and juvenile, but there’s a certain charming aspect to the song that earns a second and third listen. It’s funny because there’s someone on stage singing about not wearing underwear. There have been songs about falling in love, falling o...

Death was, to be frank, sick of it all. He was sick of long hours and bad coffee, but most of all, he was sick of dead people. “You need a vacation,” Love advised him one afternoon as they ate lunch. Death nearly choked on his sandwich. “You’re kidding, right? A vacation? I can’t just leave. Do you have any idea how hard it would be to find a stand in? In case you’ve forgotten, we don’t exactly get holidays.” “Have you ever even tried to get a stand in? Didn’t think so. You might start train...

“No, I’m sorry sir; I can’t let you do that.” “But please! I’ve got a wife and kids! What do you want, money? I’ll give you money!” He fumbled around in his wallet, throwing cash and waving his credit card around. “The PIN is 7643, just take it and leave me be, please!” The man in black sighed, rubbing his temples. “Keep your money, I’m not interested. All I want is for you to stop this and come with me.” “But I… I… please, I’m begging you, don’t do this to me!” the man frantically pleaded. “...

I awoke one morning with poetry in my mind and instead of writing it down, I watched it dancing through my thoughts, tickling the edges of my sleepy conciousness. But that was weeks ago. I don't remember those words anymore.

I used to be faster than Sarah Rhey. Once upon a freshman year, I could swim from here to there and back again in less time than her. Actually, in truth, I am giving myself airs— we were the same speed and were separated only by her goal to become a better swimmer. That comes later, though. The best place to start a story is at the beginning, which was the summer between my freshman and sophomore year. The year had been filled with dreams of making Varsity when school started again. We were ...