starlightdream's profile

starlightdream avatar
AGE: 35
LOC: Alliance, NE
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: April 16
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Poetry / Mom's Army
Version 1
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I have these pictures, right here in my hand. Who is this man, hell-bent on defending our land? I saw my son just a short while ago. Is that really him, wow, he did grow? Where was I, did I miss it all? I see now a soldier, standing tall. Can he find my baby, my sweet little boy? Does he smile for me, or just being coy? This can't be my baby, this is a man. He's been gone only a few months in the Army's hand. I have this picture, right here in my heart. A little boy grinning, with his horse ...
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Version 1
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Lightning flashes, thunder screams, drawing me from the comfort of my childish dreams. Sand blows black, like a thick, heavy veil, Smothering every memory and trail. The days so hot they burn right through, the soles of your boots become little more than goo. Nights so cold you feel as if you'll never warm, gathered for warmth inside your bag like bed spiders swarm. The wind blows constantly but no chill do you ever feel, you begin to question your sanity and what is and isn't real. Blackhawk...
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Poetry / The Call
Version 1
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The candles glow dances upon the walls, my flesh is aflame as I await your call. My skin glistens with lusty desire, the sound of your voice ignites my fire. I close my eyes and trace your face in my mind, peering deeply into your soul fearing what I will find. Our lips brush lightly against one another, my hunger grows tonight there is no other. Nimble fingers wonder idoly down your chest, I can feel my heart pound with each shaky breath. No cloth between us only skin upon skin, such an arou...
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Poetry / His Touch
Version 1
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Kneeling before him in perfect servitude, Palms turned up offering her deepest gratitude Chestnut eyes lowered in supplication, his toe teases her pearl in subtle masturbation. Obedient to the command of her Master, The sound of his voice makes her heart beat faster. His ordinance generous, loving she is collared by his touch, A soft whimper rides across the air, please she wants this so much. His hand firm as he guides her through her journey, Copper thighs quake with need her eyes go blurry...
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Quotes / True myth
Version 1
19 Reviews   5 Comments
Dragons and unicorns are real, it's virgins that are the myth.
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Reviews
Journal, Diary, & Blogging / why i do what i do
I have no critique, I have only a heart filled with tenderness, thank you for sharing, and for doing what you do.
Haiku/Senryu / Flow together like water
OH WOW!! Someone wrote a haiku I really do like!! Bravo my dear, bravo indeed! I bow to one who can make a haiku sensual, well done!
Poetry / Chimney
Ohh, there's a pain i have seen many times in my life *Chuckles* took getting preggers for the 5th time for me to finally give it up perminately *Whispers* well i hope anyway. This has a very powerful message to it, strong in it's simplicity. That being said it feel incomplete, like there should be another line after Wishing day would break Why do you want it to break? What's the purpous behind the need of the day? Help your readers to better understand your meaning. Try something like this C...
Poetry / free me
I read this piece aloud 3 different times, had my daughter do the same and it just doesn't flow too well. The lines aren't at breath marks, spoken word should be done where each line is a breath, it aid's the reader. Tighten it up a bit IE: so i sit here writing with paper and pen and i’m thinking i can’t see how this will end Sitting here with paper and pen, Thinking on how this will all end. Dont start a line with so, and, but etc. The piece is strong just lacking in it's delivery. Watcher ...
This piece was overall very well done, the sentiment behind it is absolutely gut wrenching and I commend you for tredding there. I doubt not the strength of your lines, however I will admit the point you play is a little confusing. Through the majority of this piece it would appear as through you were a husband grieving for the loss of a wife, hoever at the end it would appear as through a mother grieving for an adult child. Perhaps there needs to be another stanza in there somewhere marking ...
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