trez767's profile

trez767 avatar
AGE: 19
LOC: Plymouth, WI
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: January 01

I generally write dark and emotion filled poems with respect to black and death metal.

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Lyrics / Always
Version 1
7 Reviews   0 Comments
That one night changed it all (it changed it all) I've always needed her to need me (always needed it) And she sings her lovely song (her lovely song) That keeps me waiting for her (waiting for her) This day I'll forget nothing (nothing at all) I'll remember it all (I'll never miss a thing) Shes the one that I love And I'll always wait for her (wait for her) That one night changed it all (it changed it all) I've always needed her to need me (always needed it) And she sings her lovely song (he...
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Lyrics / No Longer
Version 2
7 Reviews   0 Comments
Feelings disappear. Shes no longer the light in my life. I don’t know why its happening. But its tearing me apart. How could this happen. How could she cut out my heart. I loved her with all I had. And then it all came apart. And that one night changed it all (it changed it all) No longer needed her to need me (never needed it) All she ever did was sing her lovely song That kept me waiting for her (waiting for her) This day I’ll forget everything (everything, everything) I’m through with the ...
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Lyrics / No Longer
Version 1
5 Reviews   0 Comments
Feelings disappear. Shes no longer the light in my life. I don't know why its happening. But its tearing me apart. How could this happen. How could she cut out my heart. I loved her with all I had. And then it all came apart. And that one night changed it all (it changed it all) No longer needed her to need me (never needed it) All she ever did was sing her lovely song That kept me waiting for her (waiting for her) This day I'll forget everything (everything, everything) I'm through the world...
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Poetry / Absent
Version 1
1 Review   0 Comments
This endless pain forever tearing at my heart These endless days never seem to never start I've got nothing to live for and no reason to die Always hating the world with its endless plights Rage consumes my heart and forces the hate from my chest Released upon an unsuspecting world This fury wind carries such great power A foreshadow of the worlds impending doom The flames disappear along with everyones dreams To be scattered across the expanse of nothingness Crushed dreams and shattered hope...
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Poetry / Dreams
Version 1
1 Review   0 Comments
There's no hope to run and hide Prolonging your own death is fruitless Except your fate just turn around Fight to the death and hit the ground as she's haunts you in your mind And you suffer your never ending plight She'll tear apart your most peaceful thoughts tonight Waiting for the chance to finish you off Lose control and then she'll strike When every waking moment is spent Thinking about the girl who haunts you at night Her hollow eyes and pale white skin An image forever burned in your ...
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Reviews
I would certainly say that this was a well thought out and planned essay. I agree with many of your ideas and theories, expecially about the One Strike You're Out argument. Many editors do not care about whether or not the story beyong that first page is amazing, the first page is what makes or breaks the publishment.
Poetry / Graceful Waste
I am not quite sure if the poem is really about making butter or not. My hunch is that you are using that as a comparison to the toils of the womans entire life. This poem caused me to think...hard...great job.
Overall this was a very strong song. The story explained and the imagery really was powerful. On the other hand, having three stanzas before a chorus makes the song seem kind of drawn out. I thought that the writing was a poem until I got to the chorus. Good job though.
Lyrics / Fading Away
This seems like maybe the first verse of a song or maybe a chorus. You definetly should extend these lyrics into a full fledged song. Great work though, keep writing!!!
Young Adult / The Mystic Ruby
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Novel Treatments / Damiens Desire II

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