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LAST LOGIN: November 27
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Version 3
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Dear Susanna, Ben Greenwood is preparing himself for a life of boredom, knowing that when he finishes school he will inherit his late father's job in a postal company. With a family that treats him as a lower life species and few close friends, Ben has few reasons to be cheerful. But when he turns up for work and finds out that he's just been employed at a company called Dragon Mail, where they use flying beasts instead of cars and deliver to lands and people existing only in fairytale,...
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Version 2
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Dear Susanna, Ben Greenwood is preparing himself for a life of boredom, knowing that when he finishes school he will inherit his late father's job in a postal company. With a family that treats him as a lower life species and few close friends, Ben has few reasons to be cheerful. But when he turns up for work and finds out that he's just been employed at a company called Dragon Mail, where they use flying beasts instead of cars and deliver to lands and people existing only in fairytale,...
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Version 1
6 Reviews
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Chapter 1 Gerald Archibald was less likely to be found sitting on a public bench than the Prime Minister of England. But unlike the Prime Minster, Gerald’s power was not commonly known, which is why he found himself largely uninterrupted bright and early one autumnal morning in the small village of Grinstead. Gerald sat on a bench, legs crossed, watching commuters stumble to work and children to school. Those awake enough would give him a look that didn’t befit a man of such powe...
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I'm not familar with these extreme short stories, so it's hard to know where to start. The last sentence is a bit confusing to me. She swigged her whiskey. Then what? How does that constitute an end? Other than that, it's well written and has me interested. -Victor
This is a really good idea. I like the way you mix sci fi and fantasy and I'm definitely interested enough to find out how they fare on planet Earth. It's really well set up. The story moves quickly (without any lull) and kept me entertained. In terms of improvement, I would perhaps try and do more of the old 'show don't tell'. For example, right at the begining you say: "Since he was an air sorcerer, he always used this method to learn about events happening from far distances." I know you h...
Hi there, This piece was a different genre to the Young Adult I'm used to seeing on the shops, which is quite refreshing. Mike is well defined as a character and you painted a nice miserable picture of his house! In terms of improvement, I felt the piece could have moved slightly quicker. It took a while to really get going and the pace picked up (and my interest) when he met the ghost girl which I thought was a good idea. Also I liked the way you painted her as attractive rather than the mor...
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